Boys are complicated creatures and boys can greatly benefit from male figures to help nurture them into being gentleman. As we reach Father’s Day, I am so deeply grateful for the trip of a lifetime I took with my son through the Caribbean. Yes, for what we saw and the fun we had, but more for the time we spent together and the conversations we had.
Father-Son Trips Are A Blessing
I have written before that my son is at a formative age in which he is learning to think critically and develop his interpersonal relational skills. The sibling rivalry with his younger sister can sometimes be intense and I wanted to take some time not just to travel, but to spend quality time with Augustine and give him a lot of personal attention.
Boys need fathers to be fathers and by that I mean that young men benefit when proper masculinity is modeled in order to maximize emotional growth and cultivate behaviors that will be beneficial for the rest of their lives. My paternal grandfather died when my father was only eight years old. While my dad turned out just fine being raised by his mother, I feel bad that he missed out on his father because I benefited so much from having my father around in my formative years.
My concern is not that I travel too much, but that the days are so packed when we are home (which is most of the time) that we don’t make time to bond in the form of extended time together. It’s one thing to speak around the dinner table or read together at night, but it’s another to invest a whole day in your child.
As I start my next trip report, let me make the clear the central point of that trip was to spend time with my son. And we certainly spent a great deal of time together…and it was a very special blessing.
The depth and breadth of restaurants was fabluous on our cruise ship and every meal together included great food…and great conversation. We savored our meals togehter, sometimes taking more than three hours, and no topic was off-limits. We talked about relationships, politics, history, religion, and the challenges of life. Without the distractions of a million things to do at home, our converastions were genuine and deep…well as deep as any conversation with a 7-year-old can be.
We read each night, we did homework together, exercised, and took long walks. We went swimming, played basketball, an sat in the whirlpool (sadly, Augustine was not allowed in the sauna or steam room due to his younge age).
It was such a blessing and something that I will do again and also the sort of trip I want to take my daughter on when she gets a little older…hopefuly she would benefit from some 1:1 time as well.
On this Father’s Day, I am thankful for my own dear father but am also thankful for the blessing of being a father and that I have learned and am continuing to learn while trying to be the best father I can be.
CONCLUSION
My father and I took a very trip together last year and I am forever grateful for that. It was a special time that I cherish.
> Read More: A Father-Son Trip To Washington, DC
I wish we had traveled together when I was younger. Our family trips were always wonderful, but there is something unique about 1:1 trips. These trips are expensive investments, both in time and money, but 100% worthwhile.
Happy Father’s Day!
The best trip with my father was the one that brought me to the U.S. for freedom and opportunity. Happy Father’s day to all.
Wonderful sentiments, Matthew. Happy Father’s Day to you and all the community of Dads in LALF.
Feliz día de los padres! It’s uncanny how Kyle and you coordinated having alternated boy -girl combinations. 🙂
My son is 22 now but I have fond memories of the father and son trips we did when he was younger. Great post Matthew – well done
“…boys can greatly benefit from male figures to help nurture them into being gentleman.”
Too bad your kid doesn’t know any.
That wasn’t very nice.
But was it funny?
No it was pretty obnoxious
Good
No need to worry about comments from someone nobody wants to have kids with
Better that than someone not allowed to come within a thousand feet of kids, eh Billy Bob?
It’s true tho
Don’t let this creep get to you Matthew, your post is beautiful and it reminds me of when I was a kid myself and would go on trips with my dad as well.
I don’t mind him, but I just don’t understand why he would want to troll becuase he is a regular reader and has shown a more reasonable side.
You’re the creep
introspection /ĭn″trə-spĕk′shən/
noun
Contemplation of one’s own thoughts, feelings, and sensations; self-examination.
A view of the inside or interior; a looking inward.
A looking inward; specifically, the act or process of self-examination, or inspection of one’s own thoughts and feelings; the cognition which the mind has of its own acts and states; self-consciousness; reflection.
Give it a try sometime.
Maybe you should!
I can only have pity for what you have experienced in life to have made you be so completely obnoxious toward a father for being a father and proud to spend time together as father and child.
You should know by now that your disappointment only amuses me.
sociopath /sō′sē-ə-păth″, -shē-/
noun
An adult who has a personality disorder marked by antisocial behavior.
A person with an antisocial personality disorder, exhibiting antisocial behavior that usually is the result of social and environmental factors in the person’s early life.
Someone with a sociopathic personality; a person with an antisocial personality disorder (`psychopath’ was once widely used but has now been superseded by `sociopath’)
I don’t get disappointed by people from whom I have low expectations or by people for whom I have no responsibility. The world is full of all sorts of characters, and I take the world as it is without being shy about recognizing how the world actually is and what needs public discussion in pursuit of improvement. Actually it makes me proud and content that I have had the privilege of being the product of a long line of good fathers who wouldn’t be proud of your kind of behavior toward others.
What I do have is pity for people whose life experience and emotional health turned out such that their behavior ought to disappoint any responsible, loving, sensible parent of theirs. If the child turns out to be incorrigible, then it’s more typical that the parents/guardians who messed up the child and that the parents/guardians were simply not honest and decent enough early and consistently enough to be willing to properly correct the child in order to make the child a better person longer-term and not an obnoxious character with a lack of proper moral bearing for life.
Funny you mention that. I’ve shown my dad many of the comments I’ve made on this blog and he finds them just as funny as I do, though a bit crude.
Also if I know my dad, and we are quite close, if he were to ever meet you he would probably describe you as whatever the Norwegian term for “dumb cunt” is.
No skin off my back with such comments coming from the likes of you. Questionable “fathers” who don’t properly educate their sons end up producing too many man-child brats who are narcissistic sociopaths with too little respect for just about everyone. The kind of “father-son” relationship that produced the Trump guy running for US President seems to maybe have had a bit too much in common with your own “upbringing”, given what you said.
Just saying, but it’s never too late for you to try to do better than the poor example you think your father supports (and which he may indeed even support). You could even start with a bit of introspection about what motivates you and what good your own questionable behavior is doing you or anyone. Consider trying to make your father more proud by being a better person than your father — this is assuming there is a loving father who typically wants better for their child than even that which they had.
Your defense is noted and rejected.
I, Chi Hsuan, illustrious commentator of Live and Let’s Fly, do proclaim that you, GUWonder shall henceforth be known as “The Traveling Cunt” in perpetuity, with all the rights and privileges thereto pertaining.
These being the words of Chi Hsuan, June 16th, 2024.
Congratulations, Traveling Cunt
BAHAHAHA I love this!!! Agreed 100%.
Hey people!!!!!
Good mood and good luck to everyone!!!!!
You should start a blog, it would be hilarious.
Meant for the commenter above you.
Enjoy the time as it goes by quickly. I lost my dad a little more than 3 years ago and it still stings every time I think to call him or think back on memories. Make sure you make time for your dad as well.
You’re the man and father needed for so many. And kudos to you for also having a mother for your boy to learn that side as well. So glad you were able to create a family and not just purchase a child as one would a toy…..
Lucky dad. Luckier son.
My late father was the kindest and most patient man I’ve ever known.
Happy father’s day Matt 🙂
Now think of you son a lot more next time you’re trying to go to a war zone.
Lol he’s still going to double down and go… what do you expect from an ukranazoid who’s pro-zelenski!!! Honestly, I hope he goes to israhell now and comes back either on a wheelchair or just doesn’t come back at all because he will be buried.
At 54, I consider myself lucky to have a great father to this day.
Hsppy father’s day.
Love this post. My dad started taking me on father-son trips at about the same age my son is now. Simple stuff, really – driving around east Texas on a Friday evening listening to music we both enjoyed on the car’s cassette player (yes, for real, cassette tapes). With gas at 75 cents a gallon back then, it cost next to nothing, but looking back on it, those drives are what made us so close after some rough years leading up to that time. I’ve started taking my son on a few trips, and I absolutely cherish every moment. Even if he drives me nuts sometimes.
Happy Father’s Day to all the loving fathers.
I recall fondly and with gratitude my first vacation trip by air with just my dad. We flew from the US to London for a few days stopover in London en route to elsewhere to visit relatives abroad. The support and patience of my dad for my niche “London mission” was amazing, as he himself had also not really seen much of London before that trip.
Surprisingly he didn’t leave you there.
To end up in a place that is poorer per capita than poor old Mississippi? That would be the UK.
My family doesn’t support the idea of having monarchs, so keeping me there would have meant providing material support to something which we don’t fancy as part of a patrilineal family tradition of its own. That said, I do like the Norwegian king — more than the other European kings — and will miss him.
I’m guessing there is much your family doesn’t support. Testosterone for example
You should start a comedy column/show and see how it goes while your father is around. Think Howard Stern meets Larry Flynt — although I don’t know if either one had their fathers’ still around when they got into the peak of their business years.
Maybe eightblack can be your sidekick — like Robin was to Howard Stern and the wheelchair was to Larry Flynt.
I need someone more dimwitted to be my sidekick. Perhaps you’d like the job?
My entertainment “career” came to an end in third-grade when I got skipped over for the role of the Wizard in Oz, so I can’t help you on the entertainment stage. But if you are really wanting a dimwit sidekick, you should look at that septuagenarian Trump clown running for US President. He cuts a “fatherly” figure? Only as a hyper-dysfunctional dude, but such figures have been the source of entertainment and inspiration for comedy.
Sounds like u had a wonderful trip. Ya did good!
My ex moved on to a new family and has 2 daughters. So I decided to try and be Mom and Dad to our son. I took him camping and to Disneyland and to the beach and skiing every year. And we went to Mexico a few times too.
He’s now in his 30s and he often tells me how grateful he is for those times we spent just the 2 of us.
My parents did not do this with their kids and I made a promise to self if I was ever a parent I would.
So glad I did cause they r for sure precious memories now for us both.
I’m a f•cking c•nt.
If you say so…
Sometimes, just going on little trips is all that you need to do – no need for the extravagant stuff. Lovely photos.
Well done! You must be a very proud father.
Happy Father’s Day, Klint.
My daughter and I spent quality time together. I didn’t get a bad tie or a card and I didn’t call that out. I was just happy my wife and daughter made an effort to be nice and we enjoyed going to a cafe and eating a donut and getting a book at the library and watching anime together.
It’s worth observing that traveler share a love of personal exploration. That it’s not just about getting to a particular site to get a photo, but the joy of getting there and learning about oneself and, from a 3rd party viewpoint, the culture we live in from another perspective.
Taking my daughter out also gives my wife an opportunity for her “me time” as well. She is able to think for herself for a bit.
FYI, my Father-In-Law in Odessa is scheduled for a visit this August. He’ll be taking the local train to Przemysl (which you’re familiar with) and then taking a flight KRK-IAD. I booked economy with United points for flexibility. He’s 90 and doing great which I attribute to his life of gymnastics which my wife is pushing (gently) our daughter onto. I don’t want your service for helping my father-in-law get into business since he wouldn’t want it (he doesn’t want luxury and eschews it).
Beautiful article! Comments… not as much.
You are an inspiration Matthew!
I think one nice thing to do is take your child to a barber.
“Barber”
That says it all.
Can we get rid of Chi?
I think people like Chi here need support to become a better and happier person rather than exile and social isolation. “It takes a village to ….. “ raise Chi.
Oh god, I didn’t have this yet I turned out fine, also, the cruise looks horrible.