Why do we generally handle morbidly obese passengers with delicacy and compassion on airplanes? It is for the same reason we afford such treatment to babies who are crying uncontrollably: both are members of the human race and therefore intrinsically worthy of dignity, the hallmark of a civilized society.
What Passengers Of Size And Crying Babies Have In Common On Airplanes
I want to talk about human dignity today. No, I’m not going to complain about fat passengers or crying babies. Instead, I’m going to observe how we deal with them and what it says about the dignity we (thankfully) still bestow on our fellow humans.
A story this week showcased a man on Norwegian Air who was so massive he genuinely needed three seats for himself (although he tried to squeeze into one). But no one said anything. In the USA, Southwest Airlines offers a second and third seat FREE to those who are too large for a single seat.
And while I believe that the obesity epidemic is one of the gravest and most correctable crises impacting the developed world, the way we dance around this issue on airplanes tells us something about ourselves.
Then there are babies, perhaps different than most passengers of size in that more often than not they cannot control their disturbance of others. Even so, there is a compassion that many show toward children that is not extended to, say, dogs onboard who also may disturb others due to painful changes in cabin air pressure.
This is good. This is the way it should be.
There’s always going to be the person who complains about babies…and fat people. And do not get me wrong, often that is justified. A passenger of size who takes up multiple seats should pay for them…full stop. No, a person cannot justifiably impinge on your space…it’s already tight enough on most airlines.
Parents should be scolded if they ignore their crying baby or allow their toddler to kick the seat in front of him.
And yet, the crying baby and the rotund man are usually ignored and often there is compassion shown by far more than show scorn.
That’s because we all yearn to be treated kindly. We know that the obese man is probably far more mortified than we are…that he knows that he is genuinely a safety hazard in case of evacuation and that he knows full well that some people look at him with hate due to his size.
He’s still a human being. The baby is still a human being. And we aim to treat others the way we want to be treated. That means that sometimes tough love is necessary, but it also means that we keep the love in tough love and don’t reduce babies to dogs or fat people to subhuman scum who annoy us like a mosquito. We show empathy and understanding, even if there is personal fault.
Human dignity is not an overreaction. Treating others with dignity does not mean ignoring the (literal) elephant in the room, but it often does call for patience and compassion. I know I can do a better job at this…and will certainly try.
image: Elliott Advocacy / Facebook
The key difference is that babies can’t control their own actions.
This man chose not to purchase more than one seat, and likely violated the contract of carriage. He should not have been permitted to travel.
I’m not sympathetic.
Morbidly obese or just use POS. Either works.
We abort 1 million unborn children in the USA every year. There is no compassion or human dignity folded to them.
How can a child be unborn? If it isn’t born then it isn’t a child.
You and your ilk believe that a baby magically becomes a human being with legal rights at birth, when of course a baby’s heart begins to beat just weeks into the pregnancy and viability is now possible at 21 weeks.
You make an arbitrary decision based on your assessment of a women’s liberty as more valuable than the right of a defenseless human to life who is unable to fight for herself. It is the same flawed logic that once argued that Black people were subhuman and therefore not owed a duty of care because they were just property.
A baby is not the property of a pregnant person. Black folks were not the property of white people, no matter what the majority may have wrongly believed or the law prescribed.
Then you cry foul over the death of Palestinian children. Such a hypocrite. May the truth set you free.
Good sister. Then please fund health care and foster care for the product of conception. This ugly diversion from topic belongs here like a rapist deserves to be president.
I couldn’t have said it any better. These weirdos on the right just can’t help themselves….they have to make everything political.
I’d like to see the compassion spoken of for the ‘life’ they see in a petri dish bestowed upon the people trying to immigrate to the USA, or who are transgender, or people of color who support other people of color, etc. The hypocrisy of the evangelical fascists of this country is comical.
Hmmm. There are certain past presidents that fit this description. But that’s an inconvenient truth for people like you.
Ever the optimist little mike!
I didn’t bring up this topic, Reality Check did. And I would not have commented had Aaron not left such an foolish comment.
Maryland, I see you post regularly here and seem to be a reasonable woman. I think you can understand why your retort is not satisfactory. If it is murder (if it really is a human life at an earlier stage of development), then it doesn’t matter that we do not fund health care and foster care as we should. Two wrongs don’t make a right. We cannot simply say murder is convenient because of other deficiencies in the system, therefore we tolerate it. No. That is the mark of an evil society!
I’m not trying to hijack anything, but you and Aaron really seem to fail to grasp what it means if that baby is a human being unable to care for herself, no different than an old woman unable to care for herself (and the illogic of being declared unhuman because of the baby’s geographic location) except for the arbitrary conclusion that it is only a baby traveling through the birth canal (or C-section) that confers personhood on her. Just because she is attached to her mother does not mean she is not a human being worthy of dignity and respect. Just like we don’t kill off people who are temporarily on life support but expected to recover.
I write to you in good faith. Please do the same.
This is a travel blog. You are off topic.
right on
A fetus’s heartbeat typically begins around 22 days after conception, or 5 weeks and 1 day of gestation. The heart is the first organ to function in an embryo, and it starts developing as early as 16 days after fertilization.
It certainly isn’t a child when it drips out your ass. Anything after that is subject to debate other than your boy toy catching it before it hits the floor obviously. .
Why do we say “Morbidly Obese”? Why is that a term? We don’t say “Morbidly Alcoholic” or “Morbidly Cancerous” – we use nicer terms like “Stage 4 Cancer” – I feel that “Morbidly Obese” is a way the medical community shames heavy people and it’s not fair. Meanwhile, I appreciated this post.
they should be shamed
If they didn’t eat more than Shamu, they wouldn’t be so fat. Or if they moved.
And don’t give me the BS about medical conditions. Those people are still eating far too much and or not exercising enough. Being a fat pig means you consume far more calories than you burn
Well written post, but despite that, my mind is not changed and I still have no sympathy for the obese man.
He has a choice in his state in life. He can easily choose to drink water over soda. Or fruit over ice cream. Or choose to exercise instead of sitting on the sofa.
A baby on the other hand is at the complete mercy of their parent(s).
There’s no reason to fat shame people. They know, deep down, that they’re morbidly obese and that they have no one to blame except the person looking back at them in the mirror every morning and night. The problem I have is that knowing that,they refuse to buy two seats to accommodate all that and they think that they have a right to encroach upon their seat mate personal space.
Parents have the ability to attend to the needs of their children and comforting them. The gentlemen here, while overweight, also appears to be large framed as well. His condition cannot be quickly corrected as with a baby. And he chose not to purchase extra space that would have stopped the inconvenience to others. That is what hinders my sympathy.
Airlines should probably recognize this is an issue that is not going to disappear, but unfortunately get worse. Safety is at risk by ignoring what is in front of you.
Well done.
Not all morbidly obese people are this way from just over eating or gluttony. Being on steroids and other medications can slap 50lbs on an individual in record time.
However common sense is warranted if you know you’re not going to fit you absolutely need to buy an extra ticket.
People are so quick to pass judgment.
We feign compassion as the current rules coupled with over authoritative flight attendants have made the penalties for even complaints about obvious out of line situations far worse for the “complainer” than just suffering the indignations.
Obesity is not caused by germs, virus, flu, etc, it’s caused by an overactive fork. They keep filling the plate, eat foods that are not healthy, the word exercise is not in their vocabulary and they show signs of laziness and selfishness .
I don’t love any of you people, in fact I wouldn’t piss on half of you jackasses if you were on fire, and I certainly feel nothing but scorn for screaming babies and Fatass pigs on planes. The only reason I can take it is because I have headphones for the brats and sit up front to avoid the blowfish.
Oh, I do miss your good repartee
Oh I know you do my friend!
Don’t worry….I’m pretty sure no one here has any affection towards you, just like the rest of the world.
Ah, regarding your previous comment about the “weirdos on the right” – the left has more than its share of weirdos and fascists.
There is a key difference between morbidly obese people and babies: the latter didn’t choose their stage in life.
Morbidly obese people who do not purchase the appropriate number or type of seat and therefore affect the comfort of their neighbours should not be allowed to travel.
SO LET’S SAY a traveller had a BMI 40+ (or just to make sure, 50+) and a best mate of similar gravitas. Our hero could then apply for a Southwest credit card (using Matthew’s links, of course). Qualify for the COMPANION PASS…and then pay for ONE seat and get 6 seats together. Every Southwest flight for more than a year. LUV indeed,
Hey Michael, I am not an evangelical and I support gay and transgender rights, plus a compassionate immigration policy to legalize the undocumented workers who contribute to making this economy great.
Any more thoughts on abortion?
Being a human being isn’t an excuse to be an inconsiderate one. If you spill over significantly, buy another seat or upgrade to a larger one. Your health is none of my business until it impedes on my comfort.
Babies can’t help it. All people are not the same. What a silly article.
In this article, there’s a photograph of a man that was more than a plus size getting into an aisle seat. This guy was one step shy of the Goodyear Blimp. At some point, the world is going to wake up (not woke up) and realize that while these people should be treated with dignity and respect, when that person doesn’t fit in the seat…HE IS TOO BIG! This is not “shaming” (what an idiotic term), HE IS TOO BIG…period. If he/she/it/whatever takes up more than the allotted space, then they must PAY for it! Why not sue General Motors, Ford, the local bus company, restaurants, et al for making their seats too small for plus size people? “morbidly obese” is a medical term, not something dreamed up. Are the airlines also supposed to allow this person to occupy an emergency exit seat so as “not to offend” this person? Not no, but HELL NO. The safety of that passenger…oh wait…the safety of the entire passenger list is affected if he gets stuck in the small over wing exit window. “But we can’t offend him! I call BULLS^^^T. If the airline doesn’t want to help the person who is stuck (literally!) with people who are encroaching on THEIR space, take a picture and contact your credit card company for a refund and file a complaint with the DOT. Don’t whine about it on “Facecrook”, “Tick Tock Clock”, or any other social media crap. Get some cahones and fight back…legally.
You’re absolutely right. Handling all passengers with delicacy and compassion, including those who are morbidly obese or upset, reflects our shared humanity and respect for everyone’s dignity. Just as we approach babies with understanding, treating all individuals with empathy and kindness on airplanes is a fundamental aspect of a civilized society. It’s about ensuring that every person feels valued and respected, regardless of their situation. Thanks for highlighting this important perspective.
Maryland -shame on you and your comments!!!Charlene you are correct in your information!!
Sorry butt, the flight attendants are at fault for not observing this obvious safety issue.