Regular readers of Live And Let’s Fly may have noticed a prominent voice in the comments section has been absent for the last several weeks. That is because he killed himself. His death is a sad testament of the fragility of life, but also a reminder to us about our priorities.
Reflecting On The Death Of A Blog Reader
For the last week I have debated whether to even write this story or not, but it is impossible for me simply to ignore what has transpired and maybe through this sad tale others will avoid a similar fate.
The Reader
Anthony Joseph, Jr. found Live And Let’s Fly at some point during the pandemic. Posting under names including Acura and Vietri, he took strong positions against the COVID-19 vaccine, which above all else seemed to be an issue he was transfixed on.
Unlike other blogs which fully censored such anti-vax commentary, we allowed him to voice his opinion, which he did. Rarely a day went by when he did not remind us of his condemnation for the COVID-19 vaccine or anyone who supported it.
For those comments, he was routinely rebuked.
At multiple points he was banned from Live And Let’s Fly for not respecting our comments policy, but it was like a game of whack-a-mole in which he would soon pop up under a different name and IP address. I found it too cumbersome to spend my days redacting or deleting comments, so we just let it slide.
Personally, I always thought he meant well, though he was clearly deeply troubled and his Captain Ahab-like monomania was disturbing.
The Story
This culminated in a story I wrote last month on a United Airlines flight attendant who has sued her employer for backpay after being sidelined during the pandemic for her refusal to be jabbed. Over the course of the next several days, Jospeh left over 50 comments on the blog, culminating with this one:
Indeed, he followed through on that threat and killed himself shortly after writing that comment.
The Bullying
No blog reader is responsible for the death of Joseph. He chose to take his own life in a manner of his choice. His obituary shares that he struggled mentally and physically for years. Being challenged on an issue is not being bullied, though when people are attacked instead of their ideas, needless pain is the result (suicide or not).
I’ll discuss our comments policy below, but I think it is helpful to always and particularly today to take a step back and think about the way in which we speak to others, whether in-person or anonymously online.
The Gospel
A week before his death, he emailed me in total despair, empty and broken from a world that felt empty to him.
I told him that the fundamental human problem–the reason he was so sad–is because he put his hope in the wrong places. He saw Donald Trump as his messiah and his utter fixation on the shortcomings of our own systems of government will lead anyone to despair. There is no salvation in any political leader or party.
I am a Christian and this was an opportunity to share what I base my hope on. That is that humans have forsaken their Creator and are mired in a hopeless search for meaning and fulfillment. Yet God calls us to a new and radical identity rooted in a historical event witnessed by hundreds, carefully recorded, and faithfully preserved through the centuries: a remarkable life, death, and resurrection of man named Jesus of Nazareth.
My hope is in Jesus and my faith is the recognition that all of us, regardless of our good works, are unworthy and that only Jesus is worthy. That is the uniqueness that separates the Christian faith from all other faiths. It’s not that we bring our good works to the table and God, in a sort of cosmic balancing test, determines whether the good outweighs the bad.
No, Christianity recognizes that we bring nothing to the table and that the saving work of God through Christ is a free and unmerited act of grace. We stand in awe of this perfect love and in debt for the price that has been paid through the death of Christ so that we may be called the sons and daughters of God. Our response is good works, but it is not our works that play any role in our salvation or the hope that is within us.
Going back to its origins two thousand years ago, Christianity was despised by the intellectual class as a fanciful crutch that weak people leaned on to try to find meaning in this cruel world. Oh yes, Christianity is a crutch. In fact, it is full body cast; a heart transplant that gives us an identity that cannot be taken, a love that can be quenched, and a hope that cannot be extinguished. For we were dead in our sin, but were made alive by Christ. That is the ultimate miracle, friends. That God would draw us to Himself and demonstrates that for us to love God and one another, we must reject the idea that we can work our way toward that goal. It is only when we recognize that we love because God first loved us and saved us from the perdition of sin that we can find rest.
Christ came not just to save the world from physical hunger, but to satisfy our greatest hunger of all: our purpose and meaning and hope in life that we cannot find in ourselves or our endeavors. Put another way, Jesus came to save us from our sins and crystalize that we are unworthy but God is worthy. As pastor and theologian Tim Keller said, “Religion makes us proud of what we have done. The Gospel makes us proud of what Jesus has done.”
I had this conversation with Jospeh a week before his death. I also urged him, whatever he thought about Christianity, to seek medical help and implored him not to end his life: that such a drastic move was selfish and would solve nothing. I shared the suicide hotline (simply dial 988) and told him to reach out to his family that loved him.
He rejected that message. He was angry and called me names that I will not repeat.
Prior to his death, he sent a final message to both me and to Kyle, who writes here on Sundays. This time, he claimed, he was really going to end it all. We took his threat seriously: Kyle called the police, even though we did not even know exactly where he was in Florida.
But the troubled young man took his own life…an obituary confirms this and I highly doubt this is all just an elaborate hoax.
This morning a funeral mass was held for him in Rhode Island. The liturgy of the funeral mass begins with John 11:25:
“I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in Me, though he die, yet shall he live.”
The great hope of a new heaven and new earth in which there is perfect peace, love, and justice is rooted in a historical reality. Interestingly, Keller departed this world on the same day as Anthony, though he died of cancer in perfect peace and contentment. What a juxtaposition.
The Comments
That brings us back to the comments policy on Live And Let’s Fly. Admittedly, his death has made me wonder whether we should take a more active role in moderating comments. As a general principle, I believe the answer to speech is more speech. I am not afraid of misinformation because I believe that in the great marketplace of ideas, we better underhand others and hone our own worldviews and convictions through dialogue, not erecting walls of separation between ideas we might find disagreeable or even repugnant.
I don’t think the final outcome for Jospeh would have changed had we censored more of his comments or the comments of others.
But I do think it is important to remember that this blog generally deals in light-hearted topics and is for entertainment. You should never take too seriously the latest story on a drunk passenger run amok or even my flight reports and hotel reviews. With limited exceptions such as this post today, this blog is an escape from the “real” world rather than a reflection of our greater priorities.
I value the great community that has developed in this blog that appears to me to be unique among the larger independent travel blogs. I hope that this continues and I while 99% of visitors do not leave comments, I am quite thankful for the 1% of you who do.
Please continue to do so, but also be mindful that even hiding behind the anonymity of the internet is a person leaving each comment. Let’s work to treat others the way we want to be treated…and that certainly goes for me too.
And let us not neglect those who find themselves in their hour of greatest need while also realizing that suicide is always and only a personal decision.
CONCLUSION
This is not a happy topic, but I hope you understand the burden on my heart and why I felt the need to share my thoughts with you today. To the Joseph family, I send my sincere condolences for the loss of your son, bother, and friend. I hope that his life will inspire others to seek help when in need, evaluate their own priorities, and realize that placing our hope in human institutions will not satisfy our greatest human need.
A beautiful post, Matthew. This entire world needs more kindness.
I do see many nasty, insulting comments on here though. It gets entirely off topic many times.
Thank you for your words and witness to your faith, God bless.
“….take a step back and think about the way in which we speak to others, whether in-person or anonymously online”
So true. I find myself, usually after some libations, being not so nice. I’ll, personally, attempt to be better going forward.
As someone who is married to someone who struggles with a mental health disorder there is no easy fix or one size fits all solution. We need to understand that everyone is going through something and be more understanding.
Thank you for the post Matthew.
Thank you for the great words Matthew,,,,,I hope he has found the peace was…..we all need to be civil,,white, black, green, grey,,,whatever,,,,and we all need to take personal responsibility for our lives….
Jesus said go forth, and fly business class…but with low fuel surcharges of course.
Enough talk about your imaginary sky wizard please.
No one is forcing you to read it.
That’s why I said please
100% agree. The religious nonsense is almsot as nauseating as the anti vaccine nonsense
It’s funny to see a human thinking they’re greater than God.
Just like the bible says – “man is stupid”.
It’s ironic. A bully didn’t like having others call him out on his bullshit.
He obviously had mental health issues and we should all be sympathetic, but it doesn’t mean anyone should excuse or stand the continuous steam of utter bs be posted
That shit went both ways, and you know it.
I mean Matthew isn’t writing about the suicide of a provax/promask bully, so perhaps not fully both ways
the actual issue of his major stances (mask, vax), yes, I agree to some extent, but the personal attacks? 100% both ways.
Yup.
Well said, Matthew, and thank you for witnessing to your faith in what is fast becoming a world that rejects the Gospel. I will pray for Joseph and his family. You did the best you could and now we must entrust him to the mercy of God.
In college I did a paper on suicide, and I included a quote I had found, perhaps apocryphal, from a man who was said to have killed himself by jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge. The story went that he left a suicide note in his apartment, and it said that he was walking to the bridge, and if even one person on the way smiled at him or spoke with him then he wouldn’t jump. He jumped, so apparently nobody gave him any notice. Whether it happened or not, I have always remembered the concept. We never know what is going on in another person’s life, so we should be careful with what we say and do.
I support the idea of this discussion and article (blog article).
I oppose suicide. A close friend of mine did so 20 years ago. Those who commit suicide should be put in prison or executed. Ok, futile.
Heavy handed censorship, which Matthew does not do, can be harmful and might even promote suicide. An example is how anonymous youngsters, called administrators, routinely and wrongly ban (Wikipedia lingo is called “block”) people on the flimsiest of reasons. I saw someone question and appeal for another person’s block and was blocked permanently for disruption. I have also seen permanent blocking on the basis of a not so terrible user name and then when they rightfully created a new name was blocked for having a duplicate account, the other one being the first one with the not so bad name. Also Wikipedia blocks when an administrator has a opposing political view. Wikipedia is (bad) entertainment, not an encyclopedia.
The pandemic has shown how bad peoples’ medical judgment and knowledge is. Mask wearing is very easy and cheap. It is not to be condemned.
Matthew,
You should be aware that you have shades of the deceased in your own nature. For him, it was the vaxx that had him fixated. For you, it’s Trump. You’ve repeatedly needlessly injected him into your articles, and apparently your TDS drove you to tell the decedent that reliance upon/belief in Trump was his problem.
Whether you realize it or not, this probably tainted the perception of rest of your response which was, standing alone, quite good.
You’ll be more effective in communication if you can avoid going out of your way to invoke polarizing political figures.
I’m glad you chose to post this, Matthew and thank you for doing so.
Reading about someone who chose to end their life always saddens me. I was a volunteer with The Samaritans in UK for 12 years and have spoken with many people about suicidal thoughts and feelings and the multitude of causes that have led to them feeling that way. While for many it’s a cry for help, being overwhelmed by life, feeling unable to continue as they are, there are some who do just want to die and there is next to nothing that anyone can say or do to change that.
It’s good of Kyle and you to try to help to the extent that you could.
Thanks again and God bless.
RIP. Yes he was a bit of a loon, even though I agree with him more than I disagree.
Please, take a big step back when you realize you’re getting too angry over internet comments. There’s more to life than this blog.
I’m sure this was one of many message board environments he was arguing with people on. I got the impression his life was consumed with this stuff
Looks like you shared that in common.
Actually I don’t, this blog just attracts a large amount of morons such as yourself that need to be smacked down
I enjoy watching you embarrass yourself. It’s entertaining.
@chad: Says a Trump supporter. He is facing espionage charges. You are lower than pond scum. Your opinion of me or anyone matters less than what an ant thinks of me. You are a disgrace to this country
This – there’s so much more to life than online commenters. I disagreed mostly with his comments, but I am sad this is his end. Hoping his community can find solace.
Agree.
As a former psychiatrist, I witnessed with dread the events of 2020, knowing the cataclysmic effects isolation, factionalism and misinformation would have on mental health. My heart goes out to this young man and all others who have suffered from the pandemic and its aftereffects. Blessings to you and Kyle, who were put in such a delicate and no win situation and hopefully, in his final moments, Mr Joseph knew peace. This is a reminder to all of us that those who read our comments are fellow humans and neutral, modulated thoughts and words can be just as effective as harsh and unkind ones.
Very insightful and compassionate response to the tragic event that you and Kyle experienced. Your grief is understandable and your use of faith to guide you is quite remarkable. You have certainly had an impact on my day, a positive one. I too struggle with life in these times, some days it takes a shield of armor to make it through. I listen to the epistles and gospel during Mass
as a spiritual guide and healer. We don’t have much else.
Thank you for this, Matthew. At the end of the day, regardless of our beliefs, we are all people but bullying others only leads to negative outcomes, so we must be careful in what we say.
Some comments here are completely off-color despite what you say here, as they are in other posts. I’ve talked about this before where I said I agree with your policy on comments, but you must step up when things get out of hand. When racism, name-calling, and other forms of nasty messages occur, you must indicate that you need to indicate that you do not condone such behavior, or else it encourages these low-lives to continue spreading their hate in an anonymous space. I really do hope that this post serves as a wake-up call and that people here on this website are more empathetic to each other.
After reading this all I can say is ” Your a good guy Matt”.
Some people would have just ignored him, but you tried to help.
While I do dislike the religious stuff, I appreciate that some people use it as a ‘crutch’, so I don’t criticise or judge. You obviously found yourself in a complicated position and you did as much as you could, so I am hoping that you will not be feeling guilty etc about this sad affair. The pandemic has caused serious psychosocial issues all over the world, and most governments and many scientific bodies/authorities have a share of the blame for one reason or another.
I like this blog.
I wonder if the “vax” and “Trump” were just his venting, through the path of the least resistance? Many times those with illness “vent” ….. those topics just happened to be at the forefront. If he was alive 50 or 100 years ago, he would have the same illness, at a different time, with different issues relevant to those times.
I have noticed that some individuals on this site appear to find pleasure (like eating empty calories) in being extremist, confrontational just for the sake of the getting a rise out of someone, or being negative. It has come to the point where I have stopped reading the comments. And that is disappointing because many exchange their thoughts and ideas while not degrading others, and tell why they feel the way they do. And the why is the most important, at least to me. In the “why” , a person shares a piece of themselves, their experiences that led to their decisions and could very well have and influence or impact on yourself.
I have often thought that we should ask those we may not agree with “why”, rather than debating them.
I hope the friends and family of Anthony can find strength and support with each other. Together, maybe they can heal.
A very nice article Matthew.
Ah, so now saying something about the covid vaccine makes one mentally ill? Ffs, this is ridiculous. I never saw any other commment from him about other vaccines, only the one with legitimate questionable issues. Of which can easily be observed in the vaers database.
Thank you for posting this, Matthew. Mental illness and suicide affects so many families, including my own. Thanks for also being willing to share your faith. If ever there was a post in which that was appropriate, this is it.
Thank you! We all fall short…to God be the glory!
wi-fi/bluetooth/cellular DIGITAL radiation affects our emotional balance. Other factors involved…of course. Many cover it up with excess caffeine/alcohol.
Microwave radiation brain/body damage…we see it everywhere…Look for article – GenZ (1997+) needs to be praised constantly. duckduckgo – generation z praise times australia dailymail ; Those who need to praised – can’t take criticism well. btw – GNOSTIC Christianity is much closer to the “truth”…we’ll learn that soon….darkness before light. NatGeo – Gospel of Judas….buckle up.
Thank you for posting this Matt. It’s sad but it was apparent to everyone he had issues when he would go on his long tangents. Even when I agreed with him, which was on many issues, I felt he spent way too much time on replies which isn’t healthy for anyone. And wasn’t changing anyone’s mind on the topic.
You trying to help him shows the true person you are, and I believe everyone here knows it as well. RIP Anthony.
Nicely said Dave.
Amen. Thank you for sharing the gospel and posting this article as you did.
I’m not a Christian or a believer of any religion but I do believe in a simple rule: Be Kind. You cannot know what is in another’s heart or on their mind and I wouldn’t want to worsen any situation. Here’s another: Say thank you. It’s free.
I enjoy this blog because of the genuine reflections such as these, and the original content you don’t see anywhere else. I appreciate the effort Matthew and Kyle put into keeping this place fresh and surprising. Thank you both,
Good post Matthew, thanks for sharing.
Thank you for your beautiful, relevant comments. A reminder to always gravitate to kindness. And a sad commentary on the lack of effective and approachable mental health treatments.
Thank you, Matthew… couldn’t have been said better.
You and Kyle tried to help when most everyone else would have stood around and done nothing. Both of you deserve to be commended for your compassion.
As someone who has someone very close to me battling a mental health issue day in and day out, it’s a long and difficult struggle. It’s unfortunate that some never can conquer the demons ravaging their mind.
Matthew, thank you for your kindness to him, and for sharing this. A friend of about 20 years recently committed suicide, with everyone struggling to search for any calls for help that we may have missed. I am not terribly religious myself but I have respect for those who are and share, as often I think it is comforting to know that energy exists even if you don’t express it yourself.
It is upsetting when people don’t admit Covid vaccines do nothing to reduce the chance of getting Covid or the severity and pretend all those who questioned the safety and efficacy of them 2 years ago are the illogical ones. Vaxxed people are at risk of terrible complications from myocarditis to not being able to move your hands (Eric Clapton). It’s not worth the risk. I’m sure pro Covid vax people can read off statistics from various centers and institutes but all those centers and institutes are highly biased and can easily manipulate the questions to get the data they want. They are not reliable sources but essentially government and pharmaceutical company propaganda.
I can see why Anthony was despondent over Trump’s failure. Trump said mostly everything right and had decent policies but it was all talk. We had a man with a 1 in 100 year following with immense popularity among his base who tweeted for 4 years instead of taking even basic executive actions. He gave no orders, appointed the worst rinos possible, left in Obama prosecutors and the military leadership, and then complained on Twitter everyone betrayed him. He did not fire people, didn’t order federal agencies, did not put in overseers in federal agencies, did not order federal agencies hire and promote specific people, and the list goes on. Trump was all talk. He let people down because he didn’t do what he said he would and we are worse off because of it. The election fraud or BLM riots gave him a 1 in 100 year opportunity to declare martial law with his 100 million followers to enforce it and leftism would be permanently defeated. In the end he did not even pardon his own people but rappers. Trump is cognitively impaired and has been for over 20 years. He is all talk and hype but the talk sounded like a savior because only someone so bold to be politically incorrect and tell the truth like that must be one. Unfortunately, he didn’t have the brains to make it anymore than talk.
Of course the vaccine does reduce both risk and severity. It also has side effects, some of which can be quite nasty, but so can be long covid- people take their chances one way or another. There is no reason to get hysterical about someone else’s attitude to risk management, the real problem is when governments coerce people to take one course of action over another. Equally, masks do protect one from respiratory infection [not just covid], but they aren’t some kind of panacea and they certainly shouldn’t be mandatory to wear outside in the open air. Of course there are political implications around all that, but there is absolutely no reason for people to descend to identity/identitarian politics.
I have posted peer reviewed studies on the subject here and half of what you say, especially with respect to masks, has long been debunked. Please stop spreading fallacies. Furthermore, long covid is largely bs. Again, read the studies, or stop whining about it. Those under the age of 40 are far more likely to have an adverse event than have “long covid” or even be hospitalized from covid. If you can’t post the peer review data or the statistics to support your claim, stop spreading fud.
The “peer reviewed” studies you’ve posted have been complete BS.
Peer reviewed by who? Will you people ever realize that continuing to spread disinformation and lies about anything will never make it true. It just shows the world what a real coward you are, and how selfish and narcissistic you are.
3+ years later and you people are still whining about the vaccines….that clearly worked. How sad you still don’t get it…..and don’t want to get it. You will only continue to torture yourself by continuing to believe lies over facts. It’s your choice.
Also, a good chunk of us who took the vaccine will drop dead in 2025, right?
See Matt? This stuff needs to stop. These two arent capable of reasonable discourse.
Brandon, this was his belief. He said that on here and he warned me via email over and over that I would die in a couple years time due to the vaccine.
As you know, I’ve become much more moderate in my vaccine position and am the first to admit the vaccine did not accomplish what it was initially sold as (prevent cases). I respect those who chose not to get it, even though I still thought (and think) it is makes sense to get it many circumstances.
But saying that we are going to drop dead in a few years takes vaccine skepticism to a whole new level.
Maybe it was. I didn’t read his every comment. I feel bad for the guy. But I never read this from him. Not saying he never said it. i don’t know. Just that I never saw it.
Pot? Hi, it’s kettle calling.
How was the DeSantis rally at the Disney world entrance yesterday?
Who cares?
You’re integrity is impressive. Thank you.
I never knew up until now
About your faith, Matt. It is such a blessing an encourangement to read todays post as last week, 2 people i know comited suicide, one of them being the daughter of a family of misaionaries that served in Romania and that i had lived with and that shares the same family name as you. If you ever think or want to travel to Romania , you have a place to stay, a car and a guide at your disposal
I lost a good friend several weeks ago to suicide. It’s not been a pleasant several weeks. I wished he had reached out beforehand. He hurt a lot of people by his actions.
Matthew, thank you for boldly proclaiming the Gospel in this dark hour, as it offers such hope for those who need it (all of us). I know that it always comes with some pushback, as is to be expected, but by being willing to use this platform to proclaim Jesus as Lord you honor him, encourage other believers, and offer hope to those who are lost.
That is unfortunate for sure. Mental health, depression and suicide are terrible.
As far as the comments section, if you had shut him out then you never would have had a chance to share Jesus and His promise of life with him. Well done.
I don’t think religion is the answer (at least not for me) but being nice and following the golden rule is never wrong.
And don’t worship politicians no matter on which side you stand. They are not the answer.
Yeah, religion is fine for those who want/need it. For those who don’t, that’s fine too.
Do you feel at all responsible for what happened?
Why? Did Aaron give him a mental illness?
Bullied him.
This is a tough issue because one might view a final and ultimate gesture of bullying as killing yourself and blaming others.
I agree with you Matthew. Anthony was his own worst enemy, right to the end. If you stand on a corner and yell absurdities you are asking for rebuttals, even if unkind. Bullying to me is if a person has no ability to defend himself for something that he can’t do anything about…and remains quiet but is attacked anyway.
@Chad
Is this the new strategy for people who engage in hate speech? For the people who call them out on it to be labeled as bullies so that they might be silenced so you can keep spouting your hate speech? If so, then it’s a huge failure.
@“Kamala”
I have no reason to.
Kudos for talking about a difficult and taboo subject that needs to be more openly discussed. Everyone knows someone who has had suicidal thoughts and most of us know at least one that followed through. Especially sad since life is so damn short anyway, but avoiding the topic does nothing to address it. No answer is “the answer” but dialogue of any kind on the subject is positive.
As for the rest, we all know the ancient golden rule of treating others as we would like to be treated. The modern version should include an addendum… never say anything online that you wouldn’t also say in public.
Despite being a non-Christian, I find beauty in what you wrote. May Anthony Joseph Jr. find solace, wherever he is now.
The fact that you don’t delete hostile comments towards you but reply to them clearly shows that you actually respect different opinions. I really hope that you don’t feel an ounce of guilt and encourage you to keep your incredible work.
You can never really know what happened to a person that led them to be the person they appear as. Thoughtful post Matthew and it was the right decision in my opinion.
Dude, really? Now this is a pretty crappy way to respond to that. You, along with two pretty awful people here did treat him pretty terrible. I don’t necessarily blame you, but you didn’t help. I actually didn’t think he would follow through that night, but I’m sad he did. This is the problem calling people “anti vaxx”, and other uncalled for names because they don’t see life through your lens. The fact that Aaron and Billy are still here after this is a slight problem. But whatever.
Lol I must live rent free inside your head.
I literally never think of you outside of this place. Then only reason I did here is due to your being a complete jerk, like right now, to this guy. This is, was, your MO.
Lol if you say so. Your commenting proves otherwise.
Matthew, this really sucks. I feel very bad for you and Kyle. The passing of Anthony is sad, but that goes without saying. I empathize with the guilt you and Kyle are feeling, but do know it isn’t your fault at all. The community that this blog creates actually brings joy and happiness to 99.9% of your readers. I look forward to reading the great content, and the crazy comments, every single day.
Thanks Jerry. It is a joy to have you as part of this community and I look forward to your every comment. I do want to make clear that I have no guilt—I believe I did all that I could. I know Kyle feels differently.
Matthew should feel guilty though for promoting that UA French Fries are somehow “tasty.” Those that die choking to death on these horrid pieces of cardboard rests solely on his hands.
I haven’t used the word “tasty” in two years! (Until now 😉 )
I’ve just clicked through to the obit and reading the comments people who knew him in person describe, is like reading about a completely different person – kind, shy, humble – not the aggressive persona he assumed online. To me the lesson is, be authentic in every area of your life and dont behind a keyboard. If you’re angry in real life, express it. Dont vent your uhappiness online hiding behind a mask.
Thankyou for a heartfelt and beautifully worded post Matthew. Thank you also for the words about your faith. Ignore the smartasses who think they are so cool and clever and scoff at everything thats not cynical and superficial.
Before I found out who this blog item was going to mention, I had assumed it would be a reference to the frequent posting FT member who committed suicide upon ending up in trouble with the NC state bar association of which he was a member and no longer allowed to practice law.
The struggles that are faced by a person who commits suicide are often taken as the driver for why a person commits suicide. But behind each anger or depression driven suicide is a body of aggregated pain, frustration and even perhaps self-loathing and even misdirected fury to which the person has surrendered on their own. Sadly, some such people are not able and willing to accept genuine help offered in good spirit; and others don’t even want such help and deliberately decide that they want to lash out at the world/their opponents by taking a big self-destructive leap and trying to guilt trip others for that self-destructive leap and one final lashing out in anger and even wanting to try to spread their own pain like an infectious disease.
Sometimes the consequences of trying to help out on a personal level is to get rewarded with undue blame. You did your best, Matthew, in trying to help him when he was close to the precipice, and the rest was up to him as someone who was missing the necessary peace in his life whether he recognized it or not.
Unfortunately what I took away from this article and the Trump being his messiah comment is that this was probably a person who thought “I should be able to own as many guns as I want whenever I want for whatever I want”.
It is not clear to me how he took his life, but I am thankful that he did not take anyone else with him.
And I of course wasn’t suggesting that him specifically would have. I didn’t know him so I can’t say. That probably wasn’t the case with him. I meant this person just fit the profile of someone who would make that argument because “that’s what ‘my team’ says I’m supposed to stand for”, when in reality their mental illness would not let them realize that they shouldn’t. It’s not their fault. It’s on us as a society to implement policies that say, no you should most certainly not own any weapons so that in a moment of crisis you don’t harm yourself or most importantly, other people.
Matthew, thank you for the boldness to share your faith and the Gospel with Anthony, and here on this blog.
Sola Gratia, Sola Fide, Solus Christus, Sola Scriptura, Soli Deo Gloria.
I’m not often a fan of openly religious posts, but this was very well-written and heartfelt. Appreciate and admire the efforts you and Kyle put in to help Anthony, a man neither of you had any real connection to.
I’m not a big fan of organized religion, but respect and understand it’s role for many people and enjoyed reading your thoughts on it.
Regarding Anthony, I hope he has found his own peace. For someone who apparently had access to medial care it’s a tragedy that he was not willing to seek or get the help he clearly needed.
My condolences to his grieving family and friends.
Matthew, you’ve done a good thing in writing about this. Thank you.
Loneliness is a dreadful disease. Christ can be constant companion for those who call on Him. And we all should reach out to those who need a friend.
Violet Crowley, the Dowager Countess of Grantham, Downton Abbey said … My Dear, religion is like a penis. It’s a perfectly fine thing for one to have and take pride in, but when one takes it out and waves it in my face, we have a problem