I had a 5:25a United flight to the Houston on Saturday morning and since the first train from 30th St Station in Philadelphia does not leave until 4:34a (22 minute journey to airport) and more importantly, because I can never sleep before such an early flight, I decided to head to the airport late Friday night. My goal was to clear security, set up by a power outlet, and get some work so that I could sleep though the flights. What do you suppose happened?
I took the last train of the night to the airport and arrived just before midnight. After printing out my boarding passes, I proceeded to the only open TSA security checkpoint in Terminal C. There were a few late US Airways flights going out, including one to Dayton at 1:10a.
By now, it was after midnight and I proceeded to the checkpoint where I was promptly stopped and told the checkpoint was closed.
ME: What do you mean its closed? Checkpoints cannot close until the last flight goes out. Besides, you’re standing here to check boarding passes, your colleague is standing in front of the metal detector, and your other colleague is sitting next to the x-ray machine.
TSA: Well, what time is your flight?
ME: 5:25a.
TSA: We open at 4:30a.
ME: Why can’t I go through now? [a US Airways crew was currently going through]
TSA: Because we are closed unless you are going out tonight.
ME: What do you mean tonight? It’s already Saturday.
TSA: I mean going out in the next couple hours.
ME: May I speak to your supervisor please?
[A two-striper who had clearly just been dipping came over]
TSA: What’s the problem?
ME: I have a flight later today. Why is your colleague telling me I cannot get through? I’ve done this before. [which is the truth]
TSA: When you going out?
ME: 5:25a.
TSA: That’s tomorrow. We’re not allowed to let you through.
ME: What do you mean that’s tomorrow? It’s after midnight!
TSA: No your flight is tomorrow.
ME: What day is it?
TSA: Friday night.
ME: Do you have a supervisor I can talk to?
[a three-stiper is summoned, who happens to be very nice–I see some fear in his eyes as well, like he’s ready for me to chew him out]
ME: Can you help me understand why it is that I have a boarding pass for a flight that departs later today but I cannot get through the checkpoint now?
TSA: These flights are technically Friday night flights, not Saturday flights. We don’t open for Saturday passengers for a few more hours. But there’s some nice chairs…
[I cut him off]
ME: Technically Friday? It’s now Saturday and these flights are scheduled to go out on Saturday.
TSA: Well, you’re right, but I can’t let you through because we are not allowed to.
ME: Says who?
TSA: Says the airport. It’s an airport rule.
ME: Can you show me the rule? I’ve done this on multiple occasions in the past.
TSA: No, but trust me, it’s the rule. You just must have been lucky last time.
ME: So you’re saying that if I book a ticket to Dayton at 1:10a, clear security, and cancel the ticket, that’d be fine with you, but I cannot get through with this boarding pass because the flight departs a little bit later?
TSA [chuckling]: Yeah, that’s right.
ME: Does that make any sense to you?
TSA: Um, not really. I don’t know why we have the rule, I just enforce it.
ME: And you can’t show me where the rule is?
TSA: No.
ME: Do I seem like a security threat to you?
TSA: No.
ME: If I had a flight at 11:59p tomorrow evening and I came the checkpoint in a few hours, about 19 hours before my flight, I’d be able to get through?
TSA: Yes.
ME: So what’s the difference?
TSA: Well, I just can’t let you through.
—
At this point, enough was enough. I laughed, thanked him for keeping us safe (in a mocking tone he did not pick up on), and even shook his hand.
Thankfully I found a quiet place to work near the United ticketing counters with a plug for my computer and a decent wi-fi signal.
Good ol’ TSA: keeping us safe, one traveler at a time.
They are there & act that way as McDonalds won’t hire them….
ME: Does that make any sense to you?
TSA: Um, not really. I don’t know why we have the rule, I just enforce it.
ME: And you can’t show me where the rule is?
TSA: No.
ME: Do I seem like a security threat to you?
TSA: No.
That part sums up 99% of why dealing with the TSA is ridiculous. That’s really all you had to post.
Great story! I was laughing as I read the entire conversation.
I’ve got as many issues with the TSA as the next guy, but maybe the airport doesn’t want people loitering on their property?
I just found this blog recently because I like hearing other people’s “planes, trains and automobiles” stories, but have read nothing but whining from you and some of the other bloggers here.
Grow up
@Joe Fly: The airport is public property, collectively owned and financed by the citizens of Philadelphia and the Commonewealth. Consequently, I have a perfect right to “loiter” if I so desire, but I wasn’t even doing that–I had a flight a few hours later and just wanted to get through, as I have done in the past.
Surely, your “grow” up statement should be directed at the TSA and their illogical security theater rather than at me.
I have an unbelievably fantastic story that @JoeFly will love: I got to airport yesterday and TSA was fantastic, as I got through in a very quick 90 minutes. The airline service was wonderfully adequate and….and….zzz zzz zzz.
While I admire your resourcefulness, the TSA and the airport just aren’t equipped to handle one offs. I’m sure they just don’t want the added operational expense associated with being open 24 hours (although the cost of closing down for 3 hours might be marginal), and they are not versed on handling the technicality you presented them with. Although at times I find the TSA repulsive and rude (in fairness, sometimes they are most professional and courteous as well), I don’t think they are the “bad guys” in this case. In the end, your resourcefulness served you well.
First of all, the ability of an airport — as well as other public conveyances and enclosed places — to control loitering is historically and legally well established. That even predates the notion of “free speech zones” bequeathed to us by the previous administration.
Secondly, if you have a problem with the rules you should take that up with the people who make the rules, not those who are called upon to enforce them. I would be considerably more worried if you told us that you were able to intimidate a TSA employ into waiving a rule than I am about the needless enforcing of one. In this case the rule is pretty clearly coming not from the TSA workers you dealt with nor even from the TSA, but rather from the airport.
Finally, anyone who believes that the deciding question on security issues is “Do I look like a security threat to you” is probably so naive as to be disqualified from having their opinion on what constitutes reasonable security measures taken seriously. Really? “All passengers not looking like security threats, please proceed directly to your gate. All passengers with beards and ticking luggage, please wait to be inspected.”
There are any number of reasons that the airport may choose to close all or part of the facility between the last flight of the night and the first one the following morning. In this case, it sounds like the only people inconvenienced were the TSA officers who had to put up — politely — with being interrogated and insulted by a member of the public.
@LarryinNYC: What a shill you are, Larry! Quite sad really. I expected better.
First, the airport is open 24 hours. Second, to loiter is to “stand or wait around idly or without apparent purpose.” Clearly I wasn’t doing that.
Third, the “they are just doing their job” defense doesn’t fly here. Sorry. Did you miss the part about the rules or lack thereof? The TSA couldn’t cite them, because they are not there. It was not any law or regulation that was stopping me from passing through the security checkpoint, only the ignorance of the TSA personnel on duty. But maybe you can point out this magic rule and prove me wrong?
Fourth, you completely miss the point about why I asked if I looked like a threat, but it is interesting that the agency you defend has loosened up on screening children and is now considering loosening screening on those over 75 (see Pistole’s letter in Tuesday’s WSJ).
Finally, are you as dense as the TSA? It was already the “following morning” when I attempted to go through security. The new day starts at 00:00:01! And just why exactly, since you say “there are any number of reasons that the airport may choose to close all or part of the facility,” are there shops and eateries and even airport information desks that are open 24 hours a day?
Matthew, I’ll reiterate that I am no fan of the TSA (you have my email, if you want to “look me up”, email me and I’ll provide my FlyerTalk handle as well as the handle I use on the TSA blog), so please understand where I am coming from.
And since you say the airport is owned by the City/State, then you should take your complaint to them and not some moron working the checkpoint.
This is equivalent to chastising a McDonald’s cashier about the price of their products.
Sure the TSA should know the rules, but the real culprit here is the airport then.
Also, nowhere in your post did the TSA say or imply that you were a security threat or that this was a security issue. So your reply of “Do I seem like a security threat to you?” was unnecessary and pure hyperbole.
Hahahaa… that’s a really funny story.
I’m about to head over to the United ticketing counter myself, to set up camp until my painfully early flight. 🙁
Wish I had read this about 6 hours ago LOL. As I sit in the lobby next to the TSA screening area freezing along with a nice military guy and a few others who’s flights were cancelled before we made it through and were rebooked on flights out in wee hours of the am. From Philly but it’s not my favorite airport by a long shot.