Sorry Bill, but you are wrong about airports and their functionality.
Bill Maher Fails To Understand What Airports Are Supposed To Be
Comedian Bill Maher ends his weekly Real Time program with a “New Rules” segment, starting with short social commentaries followed by a longer editorial. His writers often poke fun of Spirit Airlines and he frequently addresses travel. On last Friday’s episode, he addressed the functionality of airports:
Someone needs to explain what’s the point of leaving a review of an airport.
Oh look, [this user] says the food court doesn’t have enough vegan options. I guess we won’t fly to see Grandma ever again.
Airports aren’t supposed to meet your needs, they are pugratores with a Panda Express.
You don’t go because they are good, you go becuase that’s where the plane is!
I do like Bill Maher, but he’s profoundly wrong here, taking a very jejune look at airports.
No, airports are not purgatories…at least they should not be. They should meet our needs…why not?
I’ll never forget the first time I was at Frankfurt Airport in Germany and I saw that there was a grocery store (little did I know that the airport grocery is the busiest place in Frankfurt on Sundays due to Sunday closing laws…), a bank, and a dry cleaner. I found it odd at the time, but it makes perfect sense…why not make airports functional for both workers and travelers?
Look at Singapore Changi Airport (SIN), which is the great counterexample to Maher’s blathering. It has the Jewel, an architectural masterpiece, some of the best shopping in Singapore, great lounges, great restaurants, a movie theatre, and even a butterfly garden.
> Read More: Butterfly Garden In Singapore Changi Airport
In SIN, the airport is a destination itself, not just a place to catch an airplane.
A few years ago, I would have said he takes a very American look at airports, but even that is no the case any longer, as airports invest heavily into not only functionality, but beauty and customer choice, including, yes, food courts.
I look at what New York (JFK) is building, what San Francisco (SFO) has already built, how Los Angeles (LAX) or New York (LGA) have transformed themselves, and all the smaller airports like New Orleans (MSY) or Paine Field (PAE) and I think every one of those airports proves Bill wrong.
He may have just been trying to make a joke, but I didn’t find this funny and frankly, why shouldn’t airports have vegan options in the food court? A captive audience is ready and willing to spend money: you simply must offer them the product(s) they want.
CONCLUSION
I do like Maher, but he’s wrong about airports. Actually, the airport experience should be about more than just getting on a plane. Why not make airports that are beautiful public spaces with the shopping, dining, and recreational activities that make the experience far more humane? Ol Bill should get off his private jet and see how nice LAX has become…
I think both of you are wrong since each is making a general statement. It is not black and white but it really depends on the way each sees travel. I know many people that would rather miss their flight because they got to the airport way too close to the flight time than spend time at an airport waiting for their flight. I personally worked with a few billionaires in my life and maybe because they are used to fly private most of the time, flying with them on commercial planes was always a huge stress. They would get to the gate by the time they were about to close it. I had so many close calls that made me so nervous but they couldn’t care less. Their time is more valuable elsewhere. They couldn’t care less about lounges, nice stores, nice restaurants, etc… They see airports exactly as Maher described above: a place where the plane is. Nothing more than that.
I personally like to arrive at an airport with enough time to not stress out about missing my flight so having nice facilities and things to do is important to me but not to everyone.
And here in lies the value of SUBJECTIVITY. I wouldn’t say that either Matthew or Maher is “wrong;” it’s a subjective viewpoint. Matt is a travel blogger/writer/etc. so his lifestyle is inextricably tied to airports and their inner workings. I understand that. But for someone like myself, an airport is the last place within a city that I would rather spend my time. In March I was in Copenhagen and stayed at SATS Blox (a popular gym) until 2 hours before departure back to JFK, just so I could spend the least amount of time possible at Kastrup (and that’s a great airport). So to each his own. Take care all.
Note that Bill Maher had a hilarious standup routine including his own hypocrisy on “climate change” where he admitted to flying private because his time is valuable so “the airport experience” is like what you describe for rich people: Something they don’t fret about getting early to make their plane because the plane waits for them, personally.
What differentiates a First World country is the public experience. ANYONE can live well if you have a limousine pick you up and a personal chef and assistant. USA public transit sometimes remind me of that scene in Romancing the Stone where Joan Wilder sits next to the woman with the pigs and chickens on the bus to Cartagena. When the facilities and general manners of people fail, then the cost of living goes up. You feel a need to have to rent a car.
Truth be told, also, Bill Maher although being quite humorous and holding progressive views probably dislikes being around “normies” himself even without his wealth as a factor. He doesn’t want to shop at Walmart or Aldis or even walk the streets most of the time.
Why are Europe and Japan such hot destinations and often referred to as an outdoor theme park? Because (for now at least), it was the people who were like “starring characters” in Disneyworld dressed nicely daily, not just for weddings or job interviews, and acting well-mannered like out of a Hallmark movie.
I have yet to see an airport that I would go out of my way stay extra time in. As well as they may be decorated, they’re crowded and dirty and certainly not places I would spend my precious life visiting if I had a choice.
PDX for the win. It’s beautiful…
I’m with you on this, Matthew. What a load of nonsense. If you have to fly somewhere with a connection, the airport experience at the hub can be, and often is, the determining factor in choosing among airlines. I guess Mr Maher would prefer to spend six hours in the company of Schiphol mice in the Crowd Lounge or, worse still, the equally overcrowded and notoriously expensive catering outlets at IST instead of relaxing in the more civilised surroundings of a Swiss lounge at ZRH.
Does he even fly commercial? I thought he’s been flying private for the last 30+ years? I don’t think he’s seen the inside of a normal airport since the 1980s.
Airports like FRA and AMS are also massive rail hubs and both have lots of hotels and conference facilities attached as well. Lots of people are passing through there that aren’t even flying. So they can support more services like grocery stores and shops catered to the general public rather than just those flying that day.
US airports aren’t nearly as well connected and cater primarily only to air passengers. We can’t even build proper rail right up to the terminal, but instead rely on rinky dink monorails, air trains, and people movers.
I don’t agree with Bill Maher and do think airports need to constantly obsess with improving the customer experience. But sadly US airports (like most US infrastructure) aren’t the best example.
Couldn’t agree more on the differences between airports in Europe and in the US. Have you been to Denver airport? Who would want to go near that place if not flying out? AMS is a fantastic example on how Europe is ahead of the US in maximizing resources. I remember once getting my flight out of AMS cancelled because of snow, went downstairs, got a train and although a bit longer I still got to my destination.
Yeah… that’s because AMS is within an hour’s distance by train of MUCH of Europe’s top places. Easily within 2 hours of a train ride for MOST top locations in Europe (to include Chunnel to Lond0n).
What an idiotic response to compare AMS geography to DEN which literally has Cheyenne within a comparable European distance. Nothing else.
BERLIN is closer to AMS than any major metro in the US to Denver.
AMS isn’t near anything cute in Amsterdam either. Denver sure isn’t. But given European geography, AMS is geographically close to other European cities to make a train station useful.
Comparing it to DEN? Are you dense? These kinds of comments are just idiotic.
@MaxPower: Are you still in kindergarten or you didn’t even attend that? I am not comparing Amsterdam with Denver as cities but AMS with DEN as airports. Matthew is talking about how he enjoys airports, etc… and I am saying DEN is the type of airport you only want to get there to fly out. It is in the middle of nowhere and there is absolutely nothing exciting about it. How do you compare JFK with AMS? Good luck getting your flight cancelled at JFK and trying to get to Grand Central Station to get a train to your final destination. I gave AMS as a great example on how Europe uses its airports as attractive locations where you can have multiple uses of the facility as airport or something else like getting into a train.
Well said, Matt. I enjoy Real Time, but Bill’s wrong about airports. He flies private mostly anyways. Recall on Friday nights he used to tape his show in LA then jet over to Las Vegas for standup. New Rules are often fun, not always serious, and I didn’t take him too seriously on this segment. Like other performers, he’s trying to engage with his audiences, get them thinking, talking, questioning, all of which is better than nothing.
Well admittedly, if you needed to take the train because your JFK flight was canceled, Grand Central Terminal would not be the train station you would use, as only commuter trains (MetroNorth, LIRR with connections to the “S” shuttle) are available there. You would instead need to take the AirTrain-LIRR from JFK to Jamaica to Penn Station, which is both the intracity (Amtrak) and regional (NJT) hub. It would be nice if JFK had an Amtrak station, making it easier to use JFK if you live in the Mid-Atlantic or Northeast. That would make it more like AMS/FRA.
Do I care much about the reviews of ATL if I’m going to Atlanta? Of course not, what option do I have? Do I care about DFW vs. DAL, IAH vs. HOU, or IAD vs. DCA if I’m flying to Dallas, Houston, or DC? Sure. Do, I care about ATL vs. DFW vs. IAH if I’m connecting there on my way to my “final destination”? Again, it can play into the decision along with price, schedule, an airline.
I don’t think Bill Maher or his guest Mark Cuban have any idea what goes on in an airport. Surely neither of them have flown commercial in a very long time
More on Frankfurt, Germany’s airport. Two (or 3?) hotels within walking distance from Terminal 1, with their own very nice restaurants, and nearby–a hospitable & spotlessly clean Thai massage place.
Not traveling much this year–a great time NOT to fly, IMO–but there are many great international airports out there.
Bill’s point was about people who feel the need to write a review about an airport. It wasn’t really about what an airport is or should be … but rather about the people who have a need to write a review, as though that’s going to change whether a person does or does not use the given airport when it’s their airport and they are travelling.
With everyone trying to raise NPS scores, I’m not certain.