Reader Blake sent me the rebuttal below to my story yesterday on the fat-shaming passenger on United. I am publishing it, in full, because it is well-intentioned and does not denigrate others.
Matthew,
Your over-the-top political correctness blinded you to key facts in the story about a woman bitterly complaining about being stuck between two passengers of size on a United flight.
First, I am a passenger of size. And I do resent hurtful comments made about my weight, when done to tear me down. I travel frequently and am usually in first class on domestic flights, but do find myself in economy class from time to time. I see the looks of disappointment as passengers sit down next to me, though I have never experienced a passenger quite like the lady you wrote about yesterday. Even so, you are correct that we need to treat one another with respect and dignity. Not every obese person is overweight due to a lack of self-control.
But respect and dignity is a two-way street. Let’s not forget that the two passengers of size on the United flight from Las Vegas to Newark were traveling together but deliberately manipulated their seat choices, with one sitting in the aisle and the other in the window. Of course they hoped that the middle would stay open. That’s a strategy I use when traveling alone, usually booking a seat toward the rear of the Main Cabin Extra section in hopes that it remains empty.
Here, these two passengers chose these seats knowing that a passenger seated between them would find herself very uncomfortable. That is selfish and that is wrong. These passengers should not have been in the emergency exit row in the first place, since their size would cause them to block egress during an emergency.
Another thing. The woman in the middle was boorish and rude, but so was the passenger in the window seat. In fact, she was the one who repeatedly called her complaining seatmate a “bitch” while the woman in the middle never used foul language. The two overweight passengers displayed a remarkable sense of entitlement. Such behavior should not be rewarded.
Ultimately, you were right in your suggestion that passengers should discreetly approach flight attendants if they find themselves in a similar situation. But let’s not whitewash the fact that it was not the lady in the middle who was first rude.
We all have a responsibility to be nice to others, especially in the confined space of an airplane. That goes for passengers of all shapes and sizes. At least two people failed here.
Judging by many of the comments yesterday, I suspect that many of you are sympathetic to Blake’s position. My only point is that words hurt and no one should be verbally degraded in the way in which those two obese passengers were.
In a situation like this what occured is the logical outcome of airlines not doing their job and policing the situation. The FAs should have observed the situation in the exit row and dealt with it without the middle seat passenger having to deal with it.
Lol. FA in america is even more entitled than fat american. Are you nuts?
Well said.
Spot on.
It’s an uncomfortable situation for everyone – I was in this situation on a regional jet. I am smaller than average, and literally could not fit into the seat without my neighbor on top of me. I said to him first that I would try to find another seat if I can, otherwise we both suffer, and then went to the flight attendant and gate agent. A seat did open up before the flight departed and I was moved. In life in generally, being courteous and respectful is right thing to do in any situation.
I think the blame here goes solely to the FAA and airlines, but mostly the FAA.
In the end, the issue is that seats are smaller than most people and that’s an issue of regulations. I’d put the blame on the airlines for making seats too small and too densely packed, but they’re private companies with an obligation to make money, so they’re simply doing what they’re allowed to do, given that, at the bottom, price and schedule are the only real choice motivators for most consumers.
I’m in a weird place where I’m not “fat” by any normal measure (body fat is 16%/I’m 50 years old), but I am large (6’2”, 50” chest). That means a normal coach seat isn’t terribly comfortable and, especially at the shoulders, I encroach on my seat mates. There’s literally nothing I can do to change this (short of amputation) and that’s not my problem and it’s not my seatmate’s problem either. It’s a regulatory problem.
“seats are smaller than most people” ….do you live in Samoa?
Smaller seats -> cheaper price. People want cheap airfare. Those who want more space are can pay for it, and I willing to guess that discounted first class on many routes is cheaper than economy back in the golden age of flying, when adjusted for inflation.
I would like to know the perspective of the two obese people traveling together that chose seats a and c, leaving b between them. They obviously didn’t want to sit next to one another.
Completely disagree that the blame falls on the FAA or the airlines. We, fortunately, live in a free society with private enterprise. If obese people need larger seats, they can pay for them – the airlines will not stand in their way. Or they can pay for an extra seat.
It’s not the airline’s fault that there is a subset of the population who, for one reason or another, cannot be accommodated in the space which the majority of the population finds adequate. It’s impossible to cater for everyone and our lives would become ruinously expensive if the law demanded that everyone was catered for, at no extra charge, whatever their particular needs.
Finally, this is not a question of seat width – 737s and the 300-series have been flying for decades and still offer the same seat width – they’ve always been 6 across and will continue to be.
At a certain point, it’s a safety issue and the idea that “free enterprise” can solve everything isn’t helpful. I mean, I’d be happy to stand in the aisle and hold on if that’d make flying cheaper, and, I’m sure, airlines would be happy to take my money for that, but it’s prohibited because it’s not safe. And then we get to the word “obese”. Not all obese people are large and not all large people are obese. Should a 7’ tall person be required to pay extra to fly simply because of a genetic lottery? And what about the airline that’s sold out of “plus size seats” on a flight? The free enterprise model says they can still sell that person a regular person size seat, which gets us back to the original issue.
No, this is an issue that’s multifaceted. .
1 – People are larger.
2 – More people are flying.
3 – Less legroom compounds the pre-existing width problem.
4 – The internet has given people a louder voice to say things without thinking about what they’re talking about.
The blame falls on this flight crew for not addressing the exit row issue. They punted and left it up to a poor passenger to deal with. How can they laughably claim to be here “for your safety” and have allowed that situation in the exit row?
I’m amazed at the writer and the people supporting him.
Foul language? Show of hands, which is fouler, being called a bitch or being called a fat pig?
Who is in favor of a special section on planes for salad eaters?
Both “bitch” and “fat pig” seems entirely accurate in this situation. However, “bitch” is notably more vulgar. “Fat pig” is not vulgar at all, and is something even schoolchildren say.
She is a bitch. And not so skinny herself. So fat pig applied to her also.
I don’t recall her calling them “fat pigs” she called them “big pigs.”
And people wonder why I always try to fly first class and board early.
Racist old bat got what she deserved. Bye bye.
How did the woman in the middle get allocated that seat in the first instance? If she’s AA Platinum ( = One World Emerald) , then it would be poor form for her to have been allocated a middle seat on a 4 hour flight, regardless of the size of those on either side.
Presumably she didn’t select that seat herself; clearly other seats were vacant. So does AA not bother to try to offer a suitable seat to its premium passengers as other One World carriers do? I would not accept such a seat fr a flight of that duration.
They were flying United. She used miles for her ticket and that is the seat United assigned her.
“[W]ords hurt and no should be verbally degraded…”
Repeating my offer to proof your articles before you post them. 🙂
“My old days would have been to beat the bitch’s ass.”, the obese lady seated by the window is quoted in the press. The one who portrays herself as a victim of body-shaming and racism. That’s insulting, violent and threatening in one sentence. Riffraff.
Being over weight is not the only situation that makes flying uncomfortable. I’m old, have back and hip issues. I’m 110 soaking wet, but I need to move in my seat to remain comfortable.
I buy premium seats to get a bit of extra leg room in bulk head seats, reduce my carry on to nothing and pay for luggage. I don’t want to slow others up while I struggle to lift stuff into the bin.
Maybe the answer is to assign rows balanced through out the plane for anyone in need of an extender and let them solve their right to fly issues with one another. Tree extenders to a row.
The last time I was in a similar situation, I told the flight attendant the man next to me was rubbing my legs and body in a very uncomfortable manner.
I was also told that airline etiquette dictated the middle seat ‘owned’ the middle arms as it was smaller.
I don’t think I should be giving up a third of my seat because someone wanted to use it without ‘paying for it. These gentlemen knew they were about to make someone very uncomfortable. At least they could have offered her the isle seat.