• Home
  • Reviews
    • Flight Reviews
    • Hotel Reviews
    • Lounge Reviews
    • Trip Reports
  • About
    • Press
  • Contact
  • Privacy
  • Award Expert
Live and Let's Fly
  • Home
  • Reviews
    • Flight Reviews
    • Hotel Reviews
    • Lounge Reviews
    • Trip Reports
  • About
    • Press
  • Contact
  • Privacy
  • Award Expert
Home » Travel » ’Twas The Night Before Christmas (Televangelist Jetsetter Edition)
Travel

’Twas The Night Before Christmas (Televangelist Jetsetter Edition)

Matthew Klint Posted onDecember 24, 2018November 14, 2023 12 Comments

a man in sunglasses standing in front of an airplane

It is the day before Christmas and I am in a creative mood…

I want to keep the mood light this week, but as we reflect upon the season I cannot help but to offer some social commentary, in the form of a poem, on crooked televangelists. How does it relate to travel? These men fly private instead of commercial, claiming (with a straight face) that there are demons onboard commercial flights.

The scene takes place aboard Kenneth Copeland’s new Gulfstream V  jet. He’s flying with Creflo Dollar and Jesse Duplantis.

Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the jet;

Not a creature was stirring except Jesse’s pet.

A meeting was called, Creflo set the agenda;

Three men to discuss their newfound vendetta

Tonight they were flying Kenneth Copeland’s new plane,

He said God had told him it sure beat a train.

The purpose of their meeting, as it turned out,

Was to plot out revenge and cast away doubt.

A scandal had engulfed our three little preachers;

All their faces were now a primetime news feature.

What had these men of the cloth actually done?

The people, they woke up and saw cost overrun.

While the faithful had sacrificed their hard-earned dollars;

The fat cat preachers had purchased new collars.

And not only collars of expensive new suits,

but fancy new jets like most would buy fruits.

Like fake-news that had been suddenly exposed;

Our ministers found their livelihood deposed.

So here they sat, together to ponder;

Whether there was any more money they possibly could launder

You see they had grown accustomed to wealth;

They worshiped it, boasting it signified health.

But all of a sudden a vision appeared;

It was Christ Himself, a Man to be feared.

“You ignorant fools!” He loudly proclaimed;

“When you preach health and wealth you defile My name!”

Do I look like a genie who grants every whim;

To those who believe and sing the right hymn?

I came to save sinners and bring great new hope;

Not to grant you three Gulfstreams, mansions, and dope.

So why don’t you try this, instead of the lies;

Preach grace, wisdom, love, as wide as the skies?

And don’t sell people on false hopes of wealth;

Or promise them newfound jobs and great health.

Tomorrow is Christmas, it’s about much more than birth;

It’s a far greater narrative that transformed earth.

Don’t take from the Bible the words that appeal

And discard hard passages like last night’s veal.

If you ask what it means to love your neighbor;

It often involves a fair bit of labor.

See, peace doesn’t come through all of your treasures,

But knowing Me well is life’s greatest pleasure.

So here is your charge as I bid you goodbye;

Give your wealth to the poor, stop living the lie.

This act, it won’t save you, but it will show others;

That you’ve turned a new leaf, my three little brothers.

If you claim to be speaking upon My behalf;

You cannot afford to give only half.

And suddenly the preachers awoke from their daze,

But would they now actually change their ways?


image: Kenneth Copeland Ministries

Get Daily Updates

Join our mailing list for a daily summary of posts! We never sell your info.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Previous Article My Christmas Gift: Air France First Class
Next Article A Beautiful Gesture From A United Flight Attendant

About Author

Matthew Klint

Matthew is an avid traveler who calls Los Angeles home. Each year he travels more than 200,000 miles by air and has visited more than 135 countries. Working both in the aviation industry and as a travel consultant, Matthew has been featured in major media outlets around the world and uses his Live and Let's Fly blog to share the latest news in the airline industry, commentary on frequent flyer programs, and detailed reports of his worldwide travel.

Related Posts

  • jsx best US domestic airline 2025

    Travel + Leisure Names JSX Best Airline In US, But Should It Be?

    July 13, 2025
  • Turkish Airlines A330

    Some AI Great At Evaluating Award Charts, Value, Some Not

    July 13, 2025
  • Puy Du Fou Colosseum courtesy Puy Du Fou

    Ride-free Theme Park, Puy Du Fou, Voted Best In The World

    July 13, 2025

12 Comments

  1. 02nz Reply
    December 24, 2018 at 4:43 pm

    “Every great cause begins as a movement, becomes a business, and eventually degenerates into a racket.”

  2. JohnB Reply
    December 24, 2018 at 4:44 pm

    To answer that last question – No.

  3. derek Reply
    December 24, 2018 at 5:16 pm

    This kind of con man is a representative of Satan, not God. Readers should not be fooled and think poorly of God because of this.

  4. Christian Reply
    December 24, 2018 at 5:27 pm

    Well done, Matthew.

  5. Maureen Reply
    December 24, 2018 at 6:36 pm

    Amen and pass the basket

  6. Ilan Reply
    December 25, 2018 at 12:58 am

    Fantastic

  7. Dan Reply
    December 25, 2018 at 12:29 pm

    Well said. Thank you!

    • James Reply
      December 26, 2018 at 9:01 am

      +1

  8. cbw Reply
    December 26, 2018 at 9:34 am

    This is excellent. Thanks Matthew!

  9. Andy K Reply
    December 26, 2018 at 2:04 pm

    While I appreciate the sentiment and light jest, you can’t judge the hearts of those men.

    • Matthew Reply
      December 26, 2018 at 7:57 pm

      Not their hearts, but certainly their actions…

  10. Paolo Reply
    December 27, 2018 at 10:01 pm

    A special place in Hell awaits these vile, degenerate scumbags and long may they rot in it.

Leave a Reply

Cancel reply

Search

Hot Deals for July

Note: Please see my Advertiser Disclosure

Capital One Venture X Business Card
Earn 150,000 Miles Sign Up Bonus
Chase Sapphire Preferred® Card
Earn 100,000 Points
Capital One Venture X Rewards Credit Card
Capital One Venture X Rewards Credit Card
Earn 75,000 Miles!
Capital One Venture Rewards Credit Card
Capital One Venture Rewards Credit Card
Earn 75,000 Miles
Chase Ink Business Unlimited® Credit Card
Earn $750 Cash Back
The Business Platinum Card® from American Express
The Business Platinum Card® from American Express
Earn 120,000 Membership Reward® Points

Recent Posts

  • jsx best US domestic airline 2025
    Travel + Leisure Names JSX Best Airline In US, But Should It Be? July 13, 2025
  • Turkish Airlines A330
    Some AI Great At Evaluating Award Charts, Value, Some Not July 13, 2025
  • Puy Du Fou Colosseum courtesy Puy Du Fou
    Ride-free Theme Park, Puy Du Fou, Voted Best In The World July 13, 2025
  • Delta Los Angeles Hong Kong
    Delta Air Lines Challenges United Airlines With New Los Angeles – Hong Kong Route July 12, 2025

Categories

Popular Posts

  • Favorite Airline Commercials
    My 10 Favorite Airline Commercials June 15, 2025
  • a blue passport on a black surface
    All The Patriotic Quotes In Your U.S. Passport July 4, 2025
  • Qantas Lounge Review Hong Kong
    Review: Qantas Lounge Hong Kong (HKG) June 14, 2025
  • a row of seats in an airplane
    If You Abuse Company Travel Policy, Expect To Be Fired! June 16, 2025

Archives

July 2025
M T W T F S S
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
28293031  
« Jun    

As seen on:

facebook twitter instagram rss
Privacy Policy © Live and Let's Fly All Rights Reserved. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Live and Let's Fly with appropriate and specific directions to the original content.