A passenger video onboard a Lufthansa flight to Newark captures the worst-behaved child I’ve ever seen on a plane.
Although the video was posted last summer, the Daily Mail brought it to my attention today. This video was allegedly filmed on a Lufthansa flight from Munich to Newark in August 2017.
Perhaps you should watch it first:
I know this video will unleash a torrent of “ban all children from planes” comments, but let’s talk about what do in a situation like this.
I’ve seen my fair share of bad children over the years, but never something like this. The child apparently screamed for the entire eight hours…
Noise cancelling headphones won’t work. There is no place to escape to. What do you if you’re stuck with a screaming child?
Well, nothing. Nothing at all. You can’t grab the child and shake him. You can’t spank him. In fact, you probably shouldn’t even speak harshly to him. You’ll get in trouble if you offer him alcohol.
And it’s easy to blame the mother for being horrible and failing to control her little brat, but three hundred evil eyes also do not help the situation. Maybe the kid suffered from a disability (that’s my hunch). Maybe his parents spoiled him rotten. Whatever the case, I can’t see any viable solution other than to wait it out. Even if his mother is blameworthy for brining him onboard in the first place, it’s not like you can just throw them out from 40,000 feet.
The point of my post is to concede that the only thing we can do is train our own children to behave. The problem is generally not children on planes: it is teaching obedience and discipline. If you have any solution for how to deal with situations like this on the spot, I’m all ears.
Personally I feel the entire Lufthansa crew on this flight should be fired and the pilots investigated. If an adult had acted like this the plane would have been diverted. Having the child running up and down the aisles is a safety risk not only to himself but also to everyone onboard.
Hopefully every passenger files a claim against Lufthansa to have their tickets refunded.
I completely agree that something SHOULD have been done almost immediately. Parents SHOULD control their children, there are animals that behave better on planes. Disabled children behave better on planes, they do not start tantrums, there was nothing wrong with this child other than the parents allowing him to do as he does at home. Parents need to discipline children starting at home, and before flying they should be taught that people on the plane are already tired and stressed and RESPECT should be observed. There is NOTHING wrong with a good spanking, those of us who got spanked as children, are better behaved (and not mentally injured) as the ones not spanked or disciplined these days. Parents just sit there and do nothing and by saying “honey, honey” the kid will continue to do as he pleases annoying others. The parents SHOULD have controlled the kid, secondly, the flight attendants should have called attention to the parents, while at the same time, moving them to the back of the plane, and yes, if adults are deplaned for a lot less, this family should have been removed almost immediately before takeoff. There is a time limit for tantrums.
There should be a special seating arrangement for parents with children on planes, possibly charged more for the inconvenience of putting up with them on flights.
The rest of the travelers should demand a refund because the attendants didn’t take control of the situation.
I travel with my son all the time since he was a baby. And he sits quietly. Banning children is unfair to kids like him. When he was a baby the plane movement put him to sleep. And I would spank him if he even thought about acting this way. The only time he cried is when we taxied forever and he was 3 months old. But as soon as we took off he was asleep.
Wait, why can’t you blame the mother?
She may well deserve all the blame, but I just want to explore whether the child was actually disabled. Even if he is, perhaps all the blame goes to the mother.
In the entire time we heard the video, the child didn’t make one intelligible sound. That is very good proof that something is severely wrong with him. I would have been just as upset and annoyed as everyone else, but I would have been grateful that I hadn’t had a child with disabilities that I had to deal with every day of my life, 24-7, and yes, fly with as well. I have deep compassion for the mother. She has a huge burden to bear, and I have a feeling that trying to corral the child would have provoked and even more intense response.
It does. I don’t care if the child is disabled m. What makes ANYONE think that 300+ people should be tortured for 8 hrs by the incompetent decision-making of an indulgent, narcissistic parent?
Matthew, this child suffers from autism. Plain and simple. I am struggling finding a way to travel with my son to visit his grandparents. My so has autism. And I know he will do just this. No medication in this world would help him. How can we travel with these kids? It is not ok for them and not ok for their families and not ok for the crew or the other passengers.
Honestly, this is why my husband and I do not travel by plane with my twins right now. They are 19 months and as hard as we may try to parent them, it is very difficult to control their behavior in a restricted area such as a plane. We have flown once from boston, ma to orlando, fl when they were 14 months old. It was not easy and we decided not to travel again until they are much older.
And I think that is my point. My son is 16-months now and we’ve had three trips to Europe thankfully without drama, but he’s a restless little critter…you cannot spank a kid into submission in front of everyone on a plane.
May have the Grenzpolizei waiting for you when you land in Germany though!
Why not? I got my ass beat and I learned really quickly what was allowed and what’s not. And then I watched the same thing happen to my brothers… Idk why we got rid of the idea that it doesn’t work… but the trend is pretty apparent in society.
Beating a child is just poor parenting. The fact that you shouldn’t beat (and you really shouldn’t) your child doesn’t preclude you from good parenting. If however you spoil your kid and never say “NO” to it, then you’re in for a hard time.
There’s a time for a friendly “stop doing that” and a time for a stern “Pull up your pants, Mister and sit quietly!”.
No butt, no pun intented ! You can pick him up and take him to the bathroom and give him a spanking! This boy was never spanked in his life! Everyone on the plane can tell that! I had 4 children under 9 , and they were not perfect by any means but they knew who the boss was and it wouldn’t be good for them if they didn’t behave ! I knew a couple who had a child with autism and they still made him behave ! You know what makes your child happy so if you don’t spank them u can take away privileges or things they like! This lady needs some serious help ! It was rude , selfish , inconsiderate, self centered, ect… to allow your child to scream on a plane for 8 hours! It’s a sad society we live in today when we allow children to misbehave like this!!! I’m very pro spanking!!!
That’s exactly what my wife and I decided. We love our 18-month old son dearly, but I could see early on that he would not do well in the confined space of an airplane. He’s an endless little ball of energy, which is great. Just not on an airplane. We’re sticking to driving until he settles down a bit. At least we have the option of stopping for a bit whenever he gets restless.
Thank you for being considerate and unselfish. If only your approach weren’t such an anomaly!
Agreed and best for the child. However with the other child he should not heen permitted on the flight. Alternative arrangements should have been made. Other people with disabilities do this. For instance if a person cannot sit or has no mobility whatsoever. If I had been aboard and this happened I would have insisted we not leave until the child and his mother be removed. Or I would have taken another flight. Obviously the iPad did not work as the mother felt it would if he screamed for 8hours. Wonder if it was as a round trip !!!
Something could have been given to mildly sedate the child.
As a mother with a child on the spectrum, the ONLY time I’ve ever seen behavior from him that I couldn’t control was when he had been sedated. The experience put him into a severe panic mode in which he used every ounce of his being to fight the effects of sedation. Just sayin’. Luckily we weren’t on an 8 hour flight and were able to make a quick escape.
As for the child in the video, I’m not sure what caused his screaming. But I can’t imagine a tantrum being thrown for 8 hours. But I can wrap my head around a child in an immense amount of pain not being able to escape his torture, screaming for 8 hours.
because we live in the era of PreciousSnowflakism, so nobody is to blame (*except white, middle-aged hetero cis-men)
Best of luck on resolving your victimhood complex
There are cherry-flavored Melatonin tablets that the little tike would enjoy.
I disagree. I think you may be a little mentally injured from your spankings as a child.
Divert the plane, kick the little bastard and his parent(s) off the plane. Period. He’s a hazard and if he were an adult would likely be arrested.
Maybe the child has autism or another type of disability. Often children with autism look like any other child. In any case, the parent(s) should not inconvenience others if they know their child cannot behave properly or cope with travel.
lock him in the bathroom like all the other autistic kids. And stick a sock in his mouth.
Or properly parent. I don’t understand how autism is looked at like some death penalty. Give that kid extra-attention, take more time parenting, additional teaching, etc.
Potato, So in your opinion, this is a parent fail?
Would it not be fair, in that case, to divert the plane, and eject both the child and the parent?
Honestly, as I listen to this video I can feel my blood pressure start to rise and my anxiety kick in. No one should have to travel with that sort of blood curdling screaming going on the entire trip. Not to mention the climbing on chairs and running up and down. What if the plane had run into rough weather and everyone needed to be seated and belted ? This child may welll have been a safety hazard to the rest of the passengers and crew. Everyone who has flown knows that Little ones may be distressed at one point or another during a flight. 99% of us are tolerant and those of us who are parents may even try to be helpful to Mum and dad!
But this was beyond the pale.
When this noise started, regardless of medical condition ( which, if they had to travel should have been treated with a sedative ) the family should have been removed from the flight and either made other arrangements: sedated their child or not travelled at all. An 8 hour flight like that for me would have made me ill : that kind of rageful screaming is extremely disturbing frightening and emotionally draining . Who the hell starts any trip like that with their own hard earned money ? No way : Lufthansa should have removed them
I don’t think it is in any case. As a mom with a child on the spectrum, I try to consider the convenience of others, I still must take my child to the grocery store on occasion, which can be over stimulating. It doesn’t lead to screaming, but still not a fun trip in some cases. I’ve been fortunate to have help during emergencies where I may have to travel due to a sudden death in the family. And luckily my little one travels rather well, in the event I couldn’t find help. We just don’t know the events that lead to this particular flight.
And in my experience (not to attest to everyone’s experience) the only time I have had my child in a situation where I couldn’t control his behavior was when he had been sedated. This has been the only time his behavior has come remotely close to the boy’s in the video. My son went in to panic mode and tried with every ounce of his being to fight the effects of sedation. We were luckily able to make a quick escape so he could deal in private.
I watched the entire video, and based on the fact that the child was not able to express himself with words, I concluded that he was most likely disabled, which made the situation extremely sad. We need to have more compassion and patience.
I have travelled with our son since he was a year old, and have spent countless hours standing with him so that he wouldn’t fuss. We have always been cognizant of other people’s comfort and have expected our son to behave in public.
I have zero tolerance for parents who sit idly by while their children misbehave, but I just don’t think that’s what happened here.
Are you medically qualified to make that assessment? I’m a physician and have not come to the conclusion.
I hold the parents completely accountable for their lack of adequate supervision/control over their child.
I would add this kid to the no fly list so it does not ruin it for the kids that do behave well.
I’m not a medically qualified person, but I am a parent, grandparent, and former teacher, and I can tell you that this is not normal behavior, even in a very, very spoiled child. I have seen a lot of spoiled brats, but nothing like this. He has no language, just screams. It doesn’t take a qualified professional to see that there’s something severely wrong. Yes, everyone had a terrible flight, but perhaps the mother had to get him somewhere, and she had no choice. Surely it was and is worse for her than for anyone else, who after 8 hours, got to get off the plane and never see the child again
He has language. When he’s hitting the ceiling you can hear him calmly talking to mom (but can’t make out the words). This isn’t a meltdown (until the very end) or a disability. This is a spoiled brat. I have multiple degrees in child psychology and have assessed and treated many kids with disabilities.
I do not know if you have ever read this article, Mathew; but here is my own personal experience:
Brian, I missed this article. Thanks for sharing. What horrible experience!
Please accept my apologies for misspelling your name, Matthew. I usually never leave off the first silent T — or is it the second T that I left off…?!?
Oh my goodness. That is horrible. I think I would freak out. I’m not sure what I would do if the meltdown was at that level.
Parents don’t give their child limitation…. that is a really bad way to raise kids. Nasty family
I think this child had some sort of disability ie autism.
That may be true, but the mother seemed more afraid of upsetting your child than she was about upsetting 200+ other people. When parents try to be parents and nothing works I feel bad. Sadly, as in this story and in Brian’s (link above) there are times people just don’t care.
Clearly the child is autistic. He should have been meficated before fkying. The crew should be fired. Passengers should complain
Because drugging kids to the point that they are mindless zombies is the solution. BRILLIANT!
BTW: There are better solutions. Parenting and teaching tailored to special needs will do so much more than drugging a kid.
Divert the plane, kick them out. Security risk. Easy. As they have not done this, fire entire crew and refund tickets to everybody.
That poor mom…I wonder if she were traveling alone with him and/or another child. I’ve been in a situation where I felt like my children were out of control (although nothing to that degree) and it was horrible for me. I tried all of the tricks and nothing worked until finally, a nice lady behind me offered my child one of their books. I felt so stupid because I had a whole bag of tricks for them but hers were what ended up working.
While I agree that it appears as though he likely had some sort of a disability, I’m curious how the flight crew decided to go ahead and take off when he was acting like that before departure. I know it’s never good PR to kick a child off of a plane but he was acting in an unsafe manor. Someone could have gotten hurt if he fell off the top of the seats onto their heads or tripped over him as he was running to the bathroom.
Really, it’s just a horrible situation all around and I do not envy anyone involved!
Benadryl does wonders!!!! 🙂
I have a severe anxiety especially when it comes to flying. I would not be able to handle this for an hour let alone 8 hours. I don’t care if this child is disabled or not, he should’ve been medicated before this flight and hopefully this family is flagged on any other flights. This is totally unacceptable on all levels.
Love your stuff usually, but this is in very poor taste. Regardless of whether the child is disabled or just a brat, it’s not right to (re)post this video. He didn’t even ask to be on the plane and has never consented (in fact is legally unable to do so) to anyone posting a video of him. He’s just a kid, man. Imagine how you’d feel if someone posted a video of your son online. The fault may lie with the parents, but it’s definitely the child who will suffer long term from a viral video being out there. You know that the internet never forgets a thing. Please consider deleting this post, don’t know what it could possibly be doing positively for you.
Vlad, thanks for your comments. I hear where you are coming from, but I respectfully disagree. I believe this video serves as an important tool in the debate on children in plane, autism (potentially), and how to deal with children who simply will not quiet down or pose dangers to others by running around the aisles. I also think that if Augustine acted this way, it would be fair game for others to put up a video online.
What you stated is the very reason why the photograph I used in my article did not show the face of the child, Vlad.
I have clear photographs of both the boy and his parents; and I could have taken video of the incident — but I chose to protect their privacy.
Brian, I’m confused. You can clearly see the kid’s face at the 1:48 mark. And it’s also helpfully freeze-framed as the thumbnail of the video. But I agree with what you are both saying in principal–if you can truly de-identify the video then you might have a valid argument that this is about starting a debate. I don’t think showing the kid’s face helps either side of that debate though.
Those sides, by the way, would presumably be (1) let him fly, or (2) don’t, assuming you can’t fix the behavior? If the behavior is truly not fixable, then I think it’s fair to categorize it as a disability. And I’m not sure that, as a species, we want to have any sort of even hypothetical dialogue about banning disabled people for the convenience and comfort of the rest of us. Slippery slope indeed.
There is nothing about which to be confused, Vlad, as I agree with you.
I am neither admonishing nor encouraging Matthew for reposting the video; but he did not shoot it himself. The person who created and posted that video apparently had the express intention of posting it on the Internet for the world to see…
…but the basic issue is the one pertaining to the rights of all passengers aboard the airplane.
For example — directly above your original comment — Tammy wrote that “I have a severe anxiety especially when it comes to flying. I would not be able to handle this for an hour let alone 8 hours.” Who should not fly aboard that airplane — Tammy because of her severe anxiety; or the boy and his family?
Assuming that Tammy’s severe anxiety does not infringe upon the enjoyment of the flight of fellow passengers — whereas the actions of the boy did, whether or not he is legally considered disabled — one could argue that the boy should not have been aboard that airplane.
A similar — but not so clear — argument could be made for people with so-called “emotional support animals” versus passengers who suffer from allergies. Who should receive priority treatment?
Ah, apologies, I thought you were a co-author of this article and that’s what you were referring to as “my article” but I see now that your own post on the topic is quite different.
Regarding the broader picture, I guess I’m starting with the assumption that the parents have a legitimate need to move the child from city A to city B. With behavior like this, I can’t imagine they are enduring the trip for fun. In which case, I don’t really see any choice. We can’t, as a society, very well tell them that they must leave their child in city A.
We are fortunate to live in a world with amazing technological advancements to help those with severe anxiety, like Tammy, cope. This could include anything from noise cancelling headphones to prescription medication. I completely understand that this isn’t an ideal solution for her. In an ideal world, she would never have her anxiety triggered in the first place. But we don’t live in a world like that. Those with severe anxiety need to be proactive in their own care. It’s not reasonable to expect the world to accommodate. Stuff happens.
Perhaps parents of the child should be considerate for others, and use some of the “amazing technological advancements” you refer to. Besides pharmacology, they could have driven to Bruges or La Havre, and took a boat from there.
And of course, the child should also be medicated, if that’s appropriate. As George Costanza famously said, we’re living in a society.
“Even if his mother is blameworthy for brining him onboard in the first place”
Brining the little demon sounds like a good solution actually. You just need a large enough jar and enough vinegar or salt solution once you’re back on the ground.
I disagree, emercycrite, as that would really put the parents in a real pickle…
Then they’d be in a real jam!
There’s no objective evidence that the child is autistic. The parent appears -from this video at least – to take no ownership of the situation. The child quite frankly is a safety risk and it is not appropriate for the other passengers to suffer as a result of this situation. I quite possibly would have confronted the mother directly and asked her to do something. If that did not work I would have made a formal complaint to the cabin crew requesting they do the same. As for the comment about removing the video – I suggest if in the future the child is embarrassed by this video he take the matter up with his mother for allowing this situation to occur in the first place.
If before takeoff: offloading
After takeoff: tie it up
In any case the parent should have been wiser and not fly with such a child. No need to fly with children anyway.
Best is not flying at all with children. In exceptional cases if there is no way around it, not in premium class of course. And if the child does not behave, just drug it.
They were quite lucky this was Lufthansa and somehow got away with it. On a US airline he would probably have likely tasered and rightfully so in this case.
I am a parent of an autistic child. It is likely that there is a similar issue. I am not qualified to make a diagnosis but seems like it.
The first time i travelled with my child there were looks from a passenger one row behind us. I explained to him that even though disabled, my son had a right to fly a public airline. The passenger stated that those rights ended at his face. Truer words I have never heard.
On a future trip we tried the medication route. We did a trial run a week before and my son passed out for two hours. On the day of the flight my son instead became hyper for two hours. A pharmacist witnessed the two hour episode and when it ended he commented that that sure looked like a drug related episode.
Having stated the above, my son did not behave like the kid in the video. The worst he did was hit me and also try to smile two inches from a teenage girl sitting nearby. When I apologized she realized that she knew him, evidently he recognized her from summer camp two years prior.
There is much we don’t know or can only speculate on so assigning blame frankly isn’t fair. And calling for the crew to be fired is ludicrous.
To Matthew’s point there is very little that can be done in a situation like this. About all you can do is potentially offer to assist the parent in question which I suspect people likely did.
It was certainly a miserable experience but at the end of the day it was 8 hours out of a life and everyone did arrive safely and uninjured. Sometimes we simply need to keep a sense of perspective about such things.
Lead by example
If an adult had done anything remotely similar the plane would have had to make an emergency divert to offload them.
The flight attendants are to blame in this situation for not taking control. And ultimately the safety of the plane was at risk with having this little brat running up and down the aisles. What if he had tried to open one of the doors?
I was also reading another article earlier about a woman who sued an airline because she suffered hearing loss due to having a screaming child sitting next to her on a long haul flight. So while you say “it was only 8 hours” permanent damage could have be done.
If he tried to open one of the doors, he would fail. https://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2013/05/130528-airplane-door-open-midflight-pilot-eject/
You are exactly right! Permanent damage could be done by having to listen to this anxiety provoking blood curdling rage screaming for hours on end. People who have disabilities themselves such as ptsd, misophonia, anxiety etc should not have to be subjected to such torture. Bad parenting. Period. Kick them the hell off the plane!
I’m all for people treating babies and children like human beings with equal rights and all, including the right to fly – but that also means making the tough calls like removing this child and mom from the plane before takeoff (which probably would have led to a different kind of negative publicity for Lufthansa) or diverting the plane in-flight. That would have been done had an adult been behaving this way.
I don’t really blame the mom or kid – I blame the flight attendants for not doing their job and taking control.
The other customers on that flight did not get what they paid for. The parents should be fined a large amount of money. Repeat offenders should be banned from flying.
No one has the right to ruin a flight for others, and while one cannot blame a child, there should be significant consequences to hold accountable the parents who decided to bring him.
They were transported from A to B in their own seat and got fed. I don’t see how “other customers on that flight did not get what they paid for”. Sure everybody wants a quiet flight but what we “want” is hardly of relevance in most cases. Every passenger on board of a flight would want First class at no extra cost …
Straight up parents fault. Lets not sugar this shit.
Parents fault. No control over the child. If there he was disabled, the Mother should have been prepared for this type of situation and how to handle it. disturbing an entire plane for 8 hours is unacceptable.
Let’s see… how many assholes can make their general hatred of children even more evident by referring to a child as “it” or demand that they not be allowed to fly or be relegated to the back of the plane. People who think there is no reason children “need” to fly are absolutely correct. It is a two-way street though; you do not “need” to fly either. Your job requires you to fly? Negotiate the terms of your employment or find another job.
To those who justify demonizing the “mother” by claiming that there is no evidence of a disability, you are correct. We have very little upon which to make a definitive claim that this child is disabled. Likewise, however, you lack definitive evidence that the mother is to blame. You do not have all of the answers. Here’s a thought… why are we assuming this person is his mother? For all we know it could be a different relative or friend of the family or caseworker facilitating some sort of adoption. Negative presumptions carry no more weight than positive presumptions.
Maybe the woman with the child knew best, and recognized that as annoying and troublesome as the child’s actions were to the comfort of the other passengers, they were NOTHING compared to a full and total violent meltdown that would occur if the child were restrained or limited. You simply do not know. Those of you who jump to the conclusion of blame and display your general disdain for children, however, reveal volumes about yourselves.
Medicating a child that would be this stressed on a flight is a good idea. Maybe this was the child’s first flight and it was unknown territory. The next person to fly with him can talk to his physician about sedating him for his comfort. Maybe medication backfired and we witnessed the result. Who knows.
In the end, what is the bigger problem this world faces right now? Screeching children on a plane, or a lack of compassion and understanding in a world where rather than offer helpful intervention to try to be kind and help be part of a solution, we sit back griping under our breaths and taking video of the whole thing.
Hey, maybe the kid is just pissed. Look at what we are doing to the world his generation will inherit someday.
Solutions? It seems children, especially children with certain types of disabilities, are at a strong disadvantage on longer flights. Perhaps if we are going to view extreme youth as s disability, airlines should accommodate it. Put fliers who don’t want to deal with children at the back of the plane with complimentary earplugs. Cut out half of the first class seats and replace them with a sound proofed “break room” where restless children can go blow off energy, play and even scream bloody murder (while accompanied by an adult).
Been on an. 8 hour fight with that kind of disruption? It’s bad and in looking at the entire video, doesn’t look like the parents were trying hard to work with the child. I travel for work (10M miles to date) and believe all passengers have rights. Have no disdain for children, old people, disabled, or emotional support pets. Have great disdain for rudeness everywhere. Being called an asshole is counter productive my friend.
Nobody called you an asshole. You did not demean children by referring to them as “it”. You did not call a child you do not know horrible names. You did not make any comments here that insist children or people with children should be treated as second class citizens. The asshole comment is not for the people who simply disagree. The asshole comment is for those who would dehumanize a child because they feel inconvenienced.
I’ve been on both sides of this issue. Had a baby on a two hour flight scream and cry from 5 minutes after take off until landing. He flew beautifully on the way there. Turns out he had developed an ear infection and was in pain the whole flight home. No way around it, nothing to be done at that moment in time. Let me tell you, it is humiliating for the parent.
I’ve also been near a crying baby on a flight. Drove me absolutely bonkers! But that is my problem. It is not the baby’s problem and it is not the baby’s parent’s problem.
I think we should all refrain from calling people names. Too much of it in the world and it sets people off. I get that there are times that babies react and cry. The difference is in how it’s handled by the parents who seemed not to be restraining the child. If they hit an air pocket or had turbulence, child could have been seriously hurt. If they had apologized, it would have gone a long way. If an adult was disturbing plane for 8 hours, there would be consequences. Parents must take a more active roll in controlling their children, we all get that it doesn’t always work however, in this case, the parents seemed very lax and on an 8 hour flight, not good and need to be respective of everyone’s rights.
We were coming home from Europe once in first and a family came on with young kids who had been especially unruly in the club and gate area. We were steeling ourselves for a rough flight. The parents gave their kids benedryl and they slept on the flight home. Not advocating drugging kids but sure appreciated those parents consideration of fellow passengers.
I liked kids until I heard this. Zero compassion for the child or mother after thr complete lack of regard for others. Imagine your on the plane because you just lost a loved one and your nerves are shot and you have to hear that? What about people who are already anxious or perhaps in pain? Nobody else matters to that mother except her offspring which is a complete representation of herself. She raised it to act that way. Period. People are getting sick of the “Me” generation where you can act however you want at the expense of everyone else. You are right there are such other horrible things going on in this world – such as child poverty and here this spoiled brat is freaking out. Probably never has missed a meal in its life and has a thousand toys. It should learn some compassion. That mother is lucky someone didn’t flip out and start throwing punches. Not one person on the plane would blame them if it were to happen and everyone would be HAPPY! Nobody finds joy in a screaming brat but the delusional narcissistic irresponsible incapable parent of that brat.
What struck me was that the boy was out of control before takeoff. He obviously wasn’t belted in when he needed to be. Why didn’t the crew take him back to the gate? What if this had been a bumpy flight and he wouldn’t stay in his seat? Safety hazard, in addition to driving every single other passenger nuts.
I trust this was, at least, a one-way trip for him. Born in Germany and coming home with his parent?
Call me a terrible person but I’m definently making some rude comments to embarrass that Mom. How is there a plane of 200 people and no one has the balls to make a comment to her. Has no one learned public embaresment and shame is a great way to change a behavior and make a point. I don’t have kids, I don’t want kids and I don’t have sympathy for your kids. If I come across a situation like this words will definently be spoken to the parent and I doubt they’ll be kind and understanding if this situation occurred at this length. If I’ve learned anything in my life nothing changes unless you assert yourself and all I see is a plane full of 200 scared ass people. Everyone on that plane is a joke. I might seem like the bad person but when that kid gets their kid to shut because I shamed the f*ck our of their terrible parenting skills and decision making skills for even getting on the flight, wether they said it out loud or not they’d appreciate I did it. Control your kids, idgaf about your feelings if your not gonna consider mine and the rest of everyone else on board. Those flight attendants are getting some jokes made on them to for the apparent in ability to handle an all to common situation.
I agree. I think that the passengers should have banded together and confront the parent because the FA’s clearly failed in their job, they didn’t enforce airline regulations that he be secured in his seat. They also should have had the pilot come out and speak to the mother
Ok. You are a terrible person. Your grammar could also use some work…
Seriously though, if you escalate the situation, if you are rude, I’m going to shame you in front of all those people for being a douche.
You don’t want kids? Cool. You don’t want to be around kids, then stay in your mom’s basement and never leave. Kids are part of the community, and we put up with them the same way we have to put up with drunk sports fans, people who drink on flights and get loud, old people who drive slow, and douchebags that go around “asserting” themselves as if their input matters…
Nice, comment on my grammar as if it’s relevent to the situation we’re speaking of. If you understood my point than my grammer or misspelling doesn’t have to be perfect does it? lol. Also your mischaracterzing my statement. I’m generally okay with well behaved children, shit we were all kids right, there has to be some level of understanding. But if you don’t think there’s a line between a kid being unrully for a short period of time and and a child acting this way for an entire long haul flight and having the parents or FA’s do nothing then you miss the point entirely.
You know hown we deal with drunk sports fans? We kick them out. You know how FAs deal with really drunk and loud passengers, they tell them to sit and be quiet or deal with police when we get to the gate. When do we just allow children to act like this for an extended period of time? I guess we know what kind of parent you are haha.
Btw 1 you can’t shame someone that doesn’t give af what you think and 2 trying to shame me in front of a bunch of strangers I’ll never see again is suppose to make me feel bad why? Lol
So shaming the woman in front of a bunch of strangers she’ll never see again is supposed to make her feel bad why? You just refuted your own course of action as being effective. As you point out, there are people who’s job it is to evaluate and handle these situations. You are not one of them. You do not know what the staff on the plane knew. Perhaps they evaluated the situation and the need for accommodation outweighed the comfort of the rest of the passengers. Maybe not. Fact is, you are willing to verbally assault a woman and her child without knowing the facts necessary to make a reasoned judgement. The only fact you seem to care about is that you are annoyed. Get medicated.
I refuted my own point? Again I think your not comprehending. Maybe read a little slower if that helps you lol. Shaming or embarrassing someone has nothing to do with other people being around. It’s about me and that person and calling them out for their lack of parenting. It could be me and one other person in an entire terminal and someone could still feel shamed or embarrassed by the interaction enough to maybe further evaluate how they’ll handle it in the future. Also I would never directly speak to a child in that manner so idk where you got that idea? This would strictly be between me and the parent or guardian overseeing the child. And to say the need for accommodation outweighed comfort of the rest is ridiculous. It’s not about comfort. I’ve been uncomfortable on long flights, so what. But putting others safety at risk and causing enough issues that your disrupt the crews ability to do their job is a different situation altogether. Any adult acting in this manner FOR THIS LONG (another point you seem to miss, remember read slow) would be diverted and taken off ASAP. Your basically condoning this behavior and saying we have to deal with it just cause we don’t know the full issue at hand right? We don’t always need to know full context of a situation to know someone is mishaving and needs to have a stop put to it. If I see someone physically assaulted I don’t need to know the background to know the action is inappropriate and should be stopped. “You don’t know the full story they cheated on me so I’m hitting them”… “oh proceed” lol no it doesn’t work like that. I’ll say it one more time since your critical thinking ability is below par. There is a huge difference between asserting yourself when a child has acted out temporarily (which I would NOT do) and when a child has been acting in a given manner for this length of time with no repercussion by the parent or guardian.
Oh, and I live in Washington State so I’m definently medicated already 🙂 but thanks for the tip. The irony is you probably take some sort of pills or medication, I never have, doctor says I’m strong and healthy, so I guess I got a lot of years left in me to rub people the wrong way huh haha.
I remember having a red eye flight LAX-JFK with a 18 month old that was doing all kinds of crying. Why? His newborn brother was swaddled up on his mom and he wasn’t getting female attention. The dad was desperately trying to comfort him but could not to any avail. In steps the female flight attendant who walked the 18 month and old up and own the aisle in her arms calming the kid.
Ever since then, I have been a new person towards children on planes. Its doesn’t have to be a reflection of bad parenting, sometimes kids are kids and, yes, I don’t want to be by one for 8 hours crossing the Atlantic, but, I’ll get over it. Sometimes people need to be people – great example, the flight attendant who gave that poor dad a break from feeling to blame for his kid’s loud behavior.
If I had another kid on that plane, I would have had him attack the screaming demon. And honestly, I would have a very hard time not picking it up and shaking it. That’s unbelievable and like was said above, could set off people with anxiety disorders and cause even more safety problems.
Should have been tied up like we do with other safety risks and muzzled.
Put it in the crew rest area and then see if the FAs care…
Yeah, touch my kid and I punch you in the face.
The kid should have been given some heavy duty pills before take-off.
The parents should be charged a massive amount for screwing up the premium experience of passengers who paid full price for it. Alternatively they should have been offloaded before departure as ‘unfit to fly’.
I don’t know if this has been covered or not, but even if a boy was autistic, the airline could refuse travel to such a child. Air Serbia did it, and while I feel sorry for the parents and for the child, such behaviour has simply no excuses on a commercial airliner. The parents did a poor job in controlling their child, FAs did a poor job controlling the child, Lufthansa as an airline did a poor job in allowing such disruptive passenger to board an airplane.
Hope the kid’s neighbors enjoyed their “5 star experience”.
Can you say ‘Sedatives’….
It’s not always easy to just kick someone off. If in fact the child had a disability, the airline could be sued for discrimination under the ADA or some other law. It’s a catch 22 sometimes. This is why no hard and fast action has been taken on “service” animals by the airlines either.
How is the ADA going to sue a German airline? The service animals issue is only valid because they are flying on US based airlines.
ADA could potentially apply as it was a flight touching the US. That being said, I’m sure that there are other (German) laws that would prohibit discrimination on the basis of a disability.
The more interesting question would however be whether or not the case is actually discrimination. An outright ban would certainly qualify as discrimination but I wouldn’t be so sure with regard to deboarding someone out of control.
Having read a lot of comments, I’m appalled by some of the comments (suggesting anything from Euthanasia to “medicating” kids to the point that they are just mindless zombies). Newsflash: If these children don’t get the education and parenting they require, they will be a tremendous burden on society later on.
And it’s very easy to blame the parents.
1) Most of us can be lucky enough not to have been in the situation of having a kid with these types of problems
2) They’ve got that 24/7.
Call a priest??
The kid is sadly – disabled or not – a safety hazard. Crew should never allow the plane to take off in the first place. Pure and simple.
I am sympathetic, and agree there really was no good solution. However, I also note that this video seems to indicate this all happened in the economy cabin. I guess they could still hear it up in business class, but had earplugs and headphones, But I would have expected LH crew to keep the child from entering the front cabins. Reason one million and one I always try not to fly international economy. And most of the reasons have to do with other passengers.
I raised 4 children and I can say, they all screamed ONCE, and what happened next encouraged them to never do it again. Also explained to them a scream is when you are hurt or endangered.
Of course those were the days you could spank them. Altho this did not require a spank but it worked.
I was never worried to take my children anywhere they were well behaved.
This mother needs this kid taking away, she doesn’t know how to raise a child as everyone can see. As far as someone taking the boys actions on video, good for that man and I feel the childs picture belongs hanging in the POST OFFICE.
Whether the human is two, seven, or fifty-eight years old there comes a time for the benefit, safety and comfort of the couple of hundred well behaved passengers that it’s time to get out the duct tape and keep the him quiet for the rest of the trip.
My family was recently on a flight with a far less dramatic child but a bit distressing none the less.
I am a not qualified for make any diagnosis but as a parent, one can somewhat judge the age and development stage of a child as it relates to behavior.
On our recent flight (in first class if it matters to the readers) a child was screaming each time the plane stopped and/or started during the taxi to de-icing and take off. She was, by appearance, at least 10 years old. A passenger chastised her for not being a “a big girl” and kept trying to engage her in conversation, an odd combination of shaming and distracting. I could tell by her responses that verbal skills were far behind her physical age. Her mother was trying to soothe her.
Upon take off, she started screaming “we are flipping upside down” which is when I was silently screaming inside as I am a nervous flyer.
However, my stress was nothing compared to the parents who are raising that child 24/7. Thankfully, she quieted down quickly.
If you dont have children, I dont think you have a right to comment on what parents should and shouldnt do (within reason). You may think oh I would never do that, I would make sure my kids behave etc. etc. but you may find its very different.
Especially for kids with disabilities. Nobody is truly prepared for that. It comes with its joys and sorrows. Im not sure if this child had a disability but if so, speaking from experience (which some of you arent), sometimes these kids get into a such a state that you just have to wait it out. Try as you may to coax and discipline, everything can make it worse or no change.
I would challenge anyone to take something good out of this. Be glad you arent the parent, be glad the plane didnt crash, be glad you arent the child. I agree that the mother may need some parenting help, then again usually a mother knows her child best and she may know that he was in such a heightened state that there wasnt much she could do.
Speaking again from experience, it is incredibly hard to ‘deal’ with a disabled child when you have so many people watching and especially in a confined space like a plane. Did anyone even offer to help the situation?
I also agree that if she knew this may happen, it wasnt the best decision to travel especially if unprepared and yes it was a safety hazard with him running all over the plane and maybe they shouldve refused to take off due to that. But in regards to the noise…
Some perspective, my sister has disabilities- DS and tourettes and she often piercingly yells along with other behavioural issues. It is quite constant. Like every day constant too, which is a lot more than 8 hrs which people are complaining about.
It is not for a lack of trying!!!!!!! My mum has spent so much time on therapy programs etc. etc. etc. We have come a long way but every day brings new challenges and you have to accept the challenging yet wonderful gift that God has given us. I could say a lot more but I’ll just finish and say, if nothing else, these things are good for testing your mettle.
This child is severely autistic.
I’m a teacher, and I have thoughts about this child, but I’m surprised that all of you other teachers, parents, doctors etc felt qualified to diagnosis this child in a video that has clearly been edited. How can anyone diagnosis a child in a 4 minute video of an 8 hour flight?
I have lots of questions.
What did the flight crew do to respond?
Did any of the nearby passengers offer assistance?
If everybody just sat that filming with their cameras, they are just as guilty as the mother. Was she traveling alone? She may have been struggling with her own mental health issues. I certainly would have.
If this was a Who Wants To Be a Millionaire Question with the options of.
A. Nearby passengers offered to help her. Perhaps chatting together at first before one approaches and simply asks “hey, can I help? I’m a (teacher, nurse, doctor, grandma, etc) and I notice your son is having a hard time settling down. His screaming is really, well, I’m sure you can tell, it’s loud………
B. Her and her expat husband had been living overseas for just over 2 weeks when the husband died in a car accident. She was traveling home to see family. The hubby was always better able to handle their large 4 year old son, but in her state of shock, she was unable to. No one offered to help her. No one said a word. She may have thought he wasn’t bothering anyone.
C. The video has been highly edited to take video of a few selected episodes and make them seem much longer and more dramatic, and just enough audio of the mom to make her sound completely clueless.
D. Several passengers complained to the flight crew. The flight crew simply instructed her to keep her child quiet, to stay seated, follow airline guidelines, etc.
Yeah teaching at home is vital. Your kids need to have a healthy amount of fear of their parents. The evil eye or a stinging pinch will do the trick. Pinching doesn’t look as traumatic as a smack. The mother has to know how humiliating it must be and she should have done something about it. Atleast try every avenue you can to try and calm him down. Doing nothing just makes everyone less sympathetic towards you. I would hiss in my son or daughter’s ear about them asking for it real good if they keep it up. That normally stops it. And then maybe some yummy snack, a quick walk up and down the aisle, their tv? A game? I mean no one can really fault a mother if she’s trying her best right? You can only do your best.
Not all children with disabilities are the same. Putting the child on medication is the last result when nothing else is working, and they are harmful to themselves and others. Did anyone get up to try to help the mother? No. Maybe a little more support would of been kind. No one knows the mother’s state of mind, or if she was even taking the child to see a specialist. It look like the child was afraid and didn’t want to be on the plane. The child should of been in his chair with seatbelt. The mother should of taking him to the bathroom until he calmed down. Just hold him.
I have a serious question, and I’m not sure I know the answer. I just read an article about a nonverbal autistic child who was asked to leave a church because of the way the child expressed his joy by calling out loudly and laughing. As a paying customer on a flight, I have to admit, I’d be extremely uncomfortable and unhappy if there were repeated outbursts, but what if that’s part of a child/person’s disability? The American Disabilities Act states that there cannot be discrimination, so what’s the answer?
Before I watched the video, I expected it would make a lot more difference to me whether this boy was disabled or not. Nothing could possibly justify those 8 hours of laziness I saw from the mother. I feel sorry for anyone who must share a restaurant, bus, and obviously a plane with her, but I most definitely do not feel sorry for her! With such a selfish attitude as she displayed, a disabled child for her is merely karma. If the boy is not disabled, his mother should have spanked. However, if he is disabled, she should have instead spent those 8 hours screaming at the top of her lungs into his ear. That would help it to click, even for the slowest of kids, why such behavior is wrong ;-). You now full well she is self-centered enough (much like the supposed saints on this board), that if anyone else unexpectedly inconvenienced her or her son, they’d immediately get an earful.
If a child could actually scream and tantrum for 8 hours straight on a plane (bear in mind that not every child would even have the stamina), the behavior was not new or a surprise to the parent. A child can display new behaviors in new environments, but this behavior was clearly not new as it went on way too long. A child should not travel by plane until they are old enough to not behave that way, disability or not. Everyone can understand an infant screaming. This was not that.
If the child was so terrified by the experience that they screamed for 8 hours, how is it wrong to say that they should not be put through it? The parent is in the best position to know what that child can handle, and they failed to protect them from a severely traumatizing experience, Full stop. If your child behaves this way in a fully occupied apartment building, child services would be called in the US. Try it. If they behaved that way at a day care, you would be called to pick them up, and if you didn’t respond, medical authorities would be called, at a minimum.
It was inconsiderate to all the other passengers to bring a child like that on a plane and not be prepared for the behavior with at least a mild sedative. If the child could not tolerate a sedative, the child should not fly. Period. The first thing you teach your children is consideration for other people, and if developmentally they cannot be considerate, they should not be in social situations where consideration is required. It appears that the child was put through hours of torture, and so was everyone else on the plane who had to witness it.