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Home » United Airlines » Dear United FAs, Please Stick To The Script!
United Airlines

Dear United FAs, Please Stick To The Script!

Matthew Klint Posted onMarch 7, 2019November 14, 2023 29 Comments

a group of people playing instruments

Flight attendants on United Airlines will soon have more leeway and flexibility in making onboard safety and service announcements. In fact, United is even inviting FAs to show “personality”. Does that mean we are doomed to Southwest-style tomfoolery? Let’s hope not…

Brian Sumers got a hold of an internal United FA memo that shared the following:

On April 1, we’re updating our onboard announcements. The new announcements incorporate your feedback and input because we know you are the experts at how customers respond to onboard announcements. It was great to see so many of you engaged with us to bring to life our new, lighter, more conversational announcements without all the airline jargon.

Here are a few other improvements:

  • Announcements are flexible, allowing you to make them your own by showing your personality.
  • Announcements will be easier to read from the eFAAB. It’s all about the flow of the content and the scroll through the EFAAB. We made improvements to both to make it smoother for you and a better listening experience for our customers.
  • Announcements are being translated to reflect the new, lighter tone, which several of your colleagues from around the globe are reviewing to ensure they are accurate from both a cultural and linguistic persepctive.

Thus, it appears we will have more “conversational” announcements without “airline jargon” (whatever that means). That doesn’t sound too bad, though. But United also outlines other “improvements” including letting flight attendants show personality.

My Earnest Plea

I don’t know about you, but I have a plea to the wonderful flight attendants at United: please don’t go Southwest on us! The whole rapping flight announcement game and nauseating humor is just incompatible with an airline that wishes to project a professional image. Make the announcements as short as possible and don’t drone on about superfluous things. We have streaming IFE and our own devices to entertain us.

CONCLUSION

Call me Scrooge, but surely I am not the only one who feels this way. And while some may pull it off well, I’m just not in the mood to be serenaded by singing FAs or hear the one about whether bees can fly in the rain (not without their little yellow jackets). So please United FAs, let’s keep the announcements brief, professional and devoid of humor. Then again, maybe some Airplane! jokes wouldn’t be too bad after all…

What do you think about “creative” flight announcements?

(H/T: View from the Wing // image: Airplane! [fair use exception])

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About Author

Matthew Klint

Matthew is an avid traveler who calls Los Angeles home. Each year he travels more than 200,000 miles by air and has visited more than 135 countries. Working both in the aviation industry and as a travel consultant, Matthew has been featured in major media outlets around the world and uses his Live and Let's Fly blog to share the latest news in the airline industry, commentary on frequent flyer programs, and detailed reports of his worldwide travel.

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29 Comments

  1. Aldous Huxley Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 12:42 pm

    Matthew – I notice that in your posts there are quite a few references to the 1980 comedy movie ‘Airplane’ – are you a fan of this movie, by any chance (don’t worry – It’s actually my favourite movie) ?

    • Matthew Reply
      March 7, 2019 at 12:44 pm

      I love it. One of my favorites

      • Aldous Huxley Reply
        March 7, 2019 at 12:47 pm

        Surely you can’t be serious…

        • MarkyMarc Reply
          March 7, 2019 at 1:45 pm

          He’s serious. And don’t call him Shirley.

          • Aldous Huxley
            March 7, 2019 at 3:00 pm

            Was hoping someone would reply like that…

      • J Munene Reply
        March 7, 2019 at 6:58 pm

        Just wanted to tell you good luck. We’re all counting on you.

  2. Johann Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 12:46 pm

    Lighten up, Francis 🙂

  3. Howard Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 1:20 pm

    Do you make your employees work over Christmas too?

  4. Kyle Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 1:21 pm

    Unfortunately, for whatever reason, everything in marketing/advertising has been getting cornier and cornier. From commercials to in-flight safety videos. Are people really that incapable of paying attention for 5 minutes without needing unnecessary corny humor/entertainment?

    I mean, I can understand encouraging the FAs to not sound like they are reading off of a script. But, the Southwest stuff

  5. compspy Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 1:23 pm

    Matthew, I disagree with you idea and for once agree with United. I think it will do united some good to have human touch.

  6. Gary Mullen Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 2:29 pm

    FLYI Did this before filing bankruptcy due to rising fuel costs and It was greatly received. They even did Videos filmed by celebreties making jokes in order to get people’s attention.

  7. Cindy Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 2:35 pm

    I agree. Keep it professional.

  8. Steve Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 2:39 pm

    I agree with you 100% have compassion show humor and show professionalism
    I am a flight attendant for a major carrier and I can tell you I cannot stand long winded flight attendants and pilots that drone on and on over the PA

  9. AeRoSpaceman Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 2:50 pm

    Cruel April Fools Joke?

  10. William Y. Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 3:27 pm

    Thank you, Matthew. Seriously. I have the same rule for FAs as for taxi drivers: you can talk, you can get paid – but it can’t be both.

  11. John Riddel Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 3:38 pm

    Aloha Matthew, “ever seen a grown Man naked”? I completely agree with you on the importance of maintaining the professional image along with getting the message of the “safety features” of the particular aircraft digested by the guest. I also find the silly behavior of some of the flight attendants along with a few pilots at SWA on the briefings unacceptable. It doesn’t happen very often in our profession, but when an emergency happens the better informed you are about how to survive the better the chance of survival.

  12. Jess Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 4:16 pm

    I agree. It’s uncomfortable for everyone when someone who isn’t actually funny tries so very hard to be funny.

  13. Gary D Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 4:32 pm

    I can’t believe that everyone fell for this. Have you forgotten how to read? The first 3 words of the memo: “On April 1,” – hook, line, & sinker, folks!
    APRIL FOOLS!

    • Matthew Reply
      March 7, 2019 at 4:57 pm

      It’s not a joke.

  14. Andy K Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 4:58 pm

    I believe the goal should be to make announcements as short and succinct as possible. This is especially true on international flights which often have several minutes of announcements in various languages when a passenger is trying to sleep. This should be discouraged!

  15. Susan L. Egan Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 5:17 pm

    As a retired Flight Attendant of United Airlines,
    And cognizant of the importance of
    Passenger safety, the present day
    Safety presentation is too noisy, and takes away from the point United should get across about Safety on an airplane. It’s more about all the countries United flys to and the countries traditions. Passengers take
    The Safety announcement for granite as is, let alone look at the Safety card.
    Since United Airlines, Cockpit Crew,and the Flight Attendants are responsible for the Safety and Welfare
    Of our Passengers , the less self interpretation of Safety factors, the better.

  16. Kerry Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 5:32 pm

    Agree totally Matthew good call!

    I am all for friendly service and don’t want to be a grouch but it would be nice for a US airline to focus on discreet, professional service as well – and take pride in that rather than trying to make jokes or trying to create a “fun” atmosphere on board.

    • Larry Reply
      March 8, 2019 at 1:45 pm

      For granite? That’s an extremely hard lesson.

  17. emercycrite Reply
    March 7, 2019 at 5:46 pm

    Agreed. No dancing or singing FAs either.

  18. JoEllen Reply
    March 8, 2019 at 10:09 am

    I’m sick of being bombarded with an attempted “Disney” experience or repetitively over-apologizing on every transaction whether it be flying an airline, buying groceries, a cup of coffee, a can of paint. No one can think out of the box when real problems arise or exist so they feel that joking and entertaining is supposed to make people feel good ?

  19. Jimmy Gottfredson Reply
    March 8, 2019 at 12:58 pm

    “Does that mean we are doomed to Southwest-style tomfoolery?”

    Tomfoolery – love it.

  20. Steve S Reply
    March 8, 2019 at 2:17 pm

    I hope they take it as freedom to be just slightly less robotic with their annoucements, I appreciate some small amount of colloquialisms vs. word-for-word reading of the script. But yeah the Southwest stand-up comedy routines will get old.

  21. Kenneth Bryant Reply
    March 9, 2019 at 10:01 am

    Matthew: I typically agree with you, but not in this case. The air travel experience is already stressful and the opportunity to lighten the environment is refreshing. Enjoy the journey 🙂

  22. Pingback: Dear United FAs, Please Stick To The Script!

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