I had a very strange encounter with a flight attendant on a recent United Airlines flight from Paris to San Francisco. He was so impatient to conclude the meal service that he reached under the table and grabbed my napkin from my lap. In so doing, he brushed against my crotch. Sadly, that was not the extent of his unprofessionalism.
So I Finally Had A Bad Flight This Year On United Airlines…
Regular readers accuse me of being a United cheerleader and it’s true that I fly United a lot and am generally a happy client. This year, I’ve flown many longhaul flights and (at least until now) had excellent crews. The flight attendants on my anniversary trip to Tahiti were superb as was the phenomenal crew on my more recent flight from Seoul to San Francisco. There are a handful of trips I have not written about yet, but I also had wonderful crews from Denver to London with my entire family and from Frankfurt to Chicago.
In short, it has been a very good year in terms of service on United.
But my flight from Paris to San Francisco reminded me that there are still bad apples and that United remains consistently inconsistent.
I was seated in Polaris Business Class and the flight attendant was clearly grumpy from the very start (it was a morning flight…). He was an older man, probably with an immense amount of seniority to work that 11.5-hour flight.
He was working my side of the cabin. No greeting. No welcome.
There was also no pre-departure beverage served and while he grunted to others, “Breakfast?” as he walked around the cabin before departure taking meal orders, he never even stopped at my seat (I had pre-ordered breakfast, but it is still customary to confirm my choice…).
After takeoff, he came around the cabin with tablecloths, standing over each passenger and saying nothing as he waited for them to open their tray tables.
Rather than asking, “Sir, may I offer you a beverage?” he simply grunted, “To drink?”
The meal was plopped down with everything at once on the tray table (it did not even fit). Flight attendants are supposed to serve meals in courses. On this flight, the yogurt and fruit should have been served first, followed by the main course.
No beverage refills during the meal service…
It Gets Weirder…
And here’s where it got weird. He noticed that I was done eating and reached over to my tray table and yanked away the meal tray and the tablecloth underneath it.
Then he reached under the tray table and grabbed my napkin, brushing against my crotch as he did it. I certainly don’t think it was deliberate, but talk about unprofessional!
Keep in mind, that dessert had not been served yet.
I asked him, “Is there desert today?”
He crossly responded, “I don’t know. What does the menu say?”
The dessert cart did arrive, but now I had no tablecloth and no napkin.
But he wasn’t done yet. As people were still eating, he went around the cabin demanding that everyone shut their window shades. At 10:00 am…
He then disappeared until just before landing…
It’s Important To Highlight The Good, Bad, And Ugly
It’s true I could have handled this internally…complain to United, probably get some compensation, and move on. But that would be a disservice to my readers and further feed into this (false) notion that I am simply a shill for United.
I’m not. I’m a customer too and the idea that United rolls out the red carpet for me is just not true…this flight proves it and the excellent service everyone around me received on the “good” flights proves it too.
As I said above, I don’t think this flight attendant meant to brush against my crotch. But he was so grumpy and so unprofessional…and it is simply unacceptable for United to put such folks in customer-facing positions.
I won’t name this man publicly because that will not help him become a better flight attendant, even after 30 years on the job (he had three silver stars on his badge). But it’s not too late for him…I hope not, at least.
But this is a problem because I’ve heard similar stories…and if United wants to be a leading carrier, it must get the little things right, like offering a consistent experience on every flight. 9/10 is a good score for the year…most of my flights have been great…but this one was not. And the service was so egregious that I cannot help but discuss it here.
Well….did “it” move??? (Seinfeld reference)
@David … +1 for Seinfeld reference . I have never owned a TV , so I did not see the originals . However , the dvds are hilarious .
@David … Also , the additional supporting characters were brilliant . Jackie Chiles the attorney was my favourite .
I flew Starlux a couple weeks ago, and like every time I fly an Asian or Middle-Eastern carrier, I was struck by the contrast with United. The FAs are always attentive, friendly, and do their jobs with a smile, and all young of course. They bring the meals in courses, check up on you often, always offering some more food or drink. They seem to really enjoy the job. Truly a pleasure.
I rarely see that level of enthusiasm on United, especially from the older FAs. Although you occasionally get some that still have passion (And it’s great to see), more often than not they seem to be running out the clock, just eager to get the flight over with and not really caring about the customer experience.
@Chi … I have used intra-European flights on both TWA , BA , and LH . Occasionally there were older FAs . They were always very helpful and professional .
I give you +1 for JAL and NH which are always superb . Not so much on Cathay Pacific . Cultural ?
That’s a great story. We all know your mom doesn’t let you go to the market by yourself, much less fly to Asia
Oh you’d be surprised Billy Bob – Taiwanese boys – they’re the best. I call them my “candies”
I flew JX business a couple weeks back too on the TPE-SFO route! Most amazing flight, completely blew me away even though I came in with high expectations. For Taiwanese carriers, the flight attendants will always half-kneel so they are level with you instead of looking down, very minor detail but goes a LONG way.
To be fair for United, I flew SFO-TPE Polaris for the same trip and I had 2 lovely flight attendants. I told them one of my airpods fell into the seat during my nap (yes how stupid of me, i’ll nvr do that again). They actually crawled into my seat space and used their phone flashlights to look for it. Unfortunately we didn’t have success, but I truly appreciated their efforts. They did tell me they would call the mechanics on-board once we land in TPE. Sure enough, within seconds of the door opening, a young mechanic came up and helped me retrieve it. He had to take apart most of the seat in order to do that. TBH I was going to tell him its fine and to just give up many times, but he persisted and eventually found it.
Anyways if anyone is interested in watching all my JX and UA stories, its in my highlights @fred_chang on IG.
@Matthew, Ok, so you’re not naming him publicly. Fair enough. But did you/are you going to report him?
“It’s true I could have handled this internally…complain to United…” doesn’t make it clear.
If you don’t report him, he definitely won’t change. If you do, there’s a very small chance that UA will do something (and an even smaller chance that he *might* change). It would be a disservice not only to your readers but also to other UA pax if you don’t report him.
Yes, since I published the post I sent a complaint to United with the name of the FA and a link to this story. The hope is not for compensation but corrective action (just re-training). I will report back on what I hear, though I’m sure I’ll hear nothing about how the FA was handled.
Perhaps the FA was merely rushing to start the “break” time ?
Good, believe me. As much as you don’t want to be served by him, we don’t want to work with him either. He represents both United and the profession poorly—and himself!
San Francisco….check
Male Flight Attendant…..check
Grabbing c#ck
We finally found out what a certain poster here does for a living.
Unnecessary, Dave. Let’s please stay on topic.
Nonsense! This is very topical Dave
You can’t have closeted trolls just end their obsession overnight, Matthew.
STFU c**k slut
Oh look, the other closeted weirdo who is obsessed with me.
I’m not closeted, I say all the time that I’m gay.
Not like you and your secret fantasies of worshipping MAGA kielbasa.
Those aren’t my fantasies, those are the ones you are projecting on me.
And I doubt anyone here thinks you are really gay. It’s just a method conservative trolls use when posting anonymously. Identify with the group you are insulting, and use the “But I can say what I want about them, I am one of them!” line. Which is BS.
You effin Americans are so spoiled with your nonsense while your government is killing children and women around the world. That’s what you should be talking about instead of your small inconveniences on a flight. Very shallow
That would be Hamas and Hezbollah doing that, Sam.
Not on the scale that the Israeli government is, past and present.
Straight guys don’t fixate on those things because they’re secure in their sexuality.
That would be true.
Calm Down, Dave.
Oh my….. I am watching this one very close. It has all the ingredients to be the post of the year. LOL
He must have seen your recent half-naked pictures and took his shot.
Where do they find these people? Don’t they do any interviews to see who loves people?
Hmm. Grumpy might have been having a bad day or a migraine. I find ordering the shades closed odd. Nevertheless, this is a job one must power through without making the passengers uncomfortable.
How can we trust one sided story. Maybe you are the one who tried to take advantage of the situation and wanted your crotch to be rubbed.
I have plenty to eat at home, dear.
ROFL! Clapback of the Year!
What a horrible experience. Polaris class is so hit and miss that I try to fly on other Star Alliance carriers. So glad Turkish Air is now flying to Denver; great experience on that airline. I wish Swiss Airlines flew here as well!
True, bad apples everywhere. I too have had generally great experiences with United (86 segments YTD, though half have been UA Express). Had one Purser on a 757 transcon who was horrible. I was last one to board in First after my connection was late. Someone was in my seat. I booked and paid for the aisle on a 6 hour flight for a reason. Before I can say anything the purser was there and tells me “Can’t you just take his in the window?” I asked well then what’s wrong with it? The man in my seat volunteered that the lumbar support won’t go down and it’s uncomfortable. I could also obviously see from the app that seat was assigned to the one person on the upgrade list who cleared at the gate. I asked the purser what makes her think I want the broken seat? Or is this just what I get because United can’t manage to find a gate agent to meet an already delayed inbound connection? I went to the lav and came out and the guy was back in his assigned seat. Other than plopping the meal tray down, Purser didn’t interact with me for hours… offered refills to other side of aisle and my seatmate but not me. I went to the back halfway through the flight to ask for a bottle of water and a can of soda since it was clear I was being ignored. The F/A followed me back up to the front and went behind the pulled curtain to the galley. She came out with a drink refill and came back to see me again two more times. I wrote United and they gave me 8,000 miles which seemed a lot but hey!
sure it wasn’t a TSA dressed up as a FA?
Seniority should not be the criteria for getting the best flights (long haul international).
It should go to the crew that provides the best service (especially Polaris long haul international which is also the biggest moneymaker).
Alas we have a system in the USA that does not reward performance just seniority so we end up with entitled senior members who do not care about service working up front long haul (not to say that all are).
Until that system goes away (and it will not unfortunately) we will struggle to match the service provided by international carriers.
It should not, but unfortunately it is. I have a friend who has been a FA with Delta for 25 years. He gets the purser job on Delta One flights from Minneapolis to Europe but he is not senior enough to get that job on flights from Minneapolis to Japan. He said he will need another 3 to 4 years to have the chance to get into the Tokyo flights. He might be able to get into coach but I guess that is not interesting to him. Also, with seniority comes flexibility and perks. During summer months, all he does is 1 flight per week to Iceland. That’s it. He then spends time at home taking care of his yard or enjoying the pool. Sometimes in the fall he does some daily round trips but he is always back home by end of the day. The only time he spends at hotels is on the flights to Europe. Last summer he surprised us and he was the purser on our flight from Europe back home. No need to say he was amazing.
Thanks for posting this Matt and thanks even more for notifying UAL For some reason I seem to run into these old meanies a lot more than you do.
“become a better flight attendant, even after 30 years on the job (he had three silver stars on his badge). But it’s not too late for him…I hope not, at least.”
I mean, after 30 years, he still doesn’t know how to be a good FA? Not sure if some additional training could fix that.
Sounds like Senior Dad did not get laid in Gay Paris…or maybe he did and was still frisky….or maybe he was tired from sight seeing, shopping, too much rich food and wine. Glad you reported him. He sounds like an A type personality who uses his position of responsibility to his advantage and then will run to Union when poop hits the fan. Or….another Crew member with more seniority bumped him from galley duty and he has to serve the passengers, who pay his wage..or he is Union and throwing attitude to get a Contract. Drop United for a bit and give them a hard time, cause he wanted to give you one and you refused. Good on you
I’m a FA for a different airline. In my past life I flew UA for decades and am a MM. I had my good and bad. You have a lot of credibility in my book so I read your post as accurate. It struck a chord with a few TA and TP flights I remember over the years. No, you won’t hear about what happens to the FA. But he will hear. He will have union protection. But UA will see this as an affront to their product. The little details make the most difference. And brash service from a rude FA will eat at any onboard product manager like nails on a chalkboard. All FA’s have bad days. But we still have to be professional or stay home. You bid to work that part of the plane, so at 30 years he could have chosen something else in the cabin..like staying in the galley. Cheers.
Did you reach a milestone with UA? Maybe he was just trying to congratulate you.
You had a surly flight attendant on a US carrier. Seriously dude, get over yourself.
At very best this was a gratuitous post. Putting aside whether you consider yourself a serious journalist, do you think you are achieving anything other than crotch clicks.?
I’m just a blogger and I wrote about my travels.
Sounds like you got SA on UA.
Yet you’ll continue to glaze them everyday.
I don’t think the FA will get better on his own, I would have put his picture in this post. You’re a better man than I am.
This is entirely normal for UA.
Why are u behaving like it is extraordinary?
A reasonable person would tell u to move on & write something worth reading.
Yawn. You haven’t been nice lately.
As a straight male, I feel like I’m “groped” about once a year by another adult working in a security, travel, or medical context. Examples include a pat down that’s unnecessarily thorough by a male security guard or a middle-aged female nurse brushing against me in ambiguously intimate way.
It’s hard to tell intent. As long as the other person is not unpleasant and the contact is brief, I try to ignore it even if I suspect something else going on. Men just aren’t allowed to make a fuss
What are you trying to accomplish? More followers? I am suspect.
Showing balance…regular readers can offer more insight.
As a UA FA, it bothers me to hear these stories. Not so much as the crotch touch (which you likely wouldn’t have noticed if he had been a great FA) but the fact that a number of bad apples make the rest of us look bad. I fly around 200 hours a month and get dozens of heartfelt, honest compliments from customers per month. These interactions energize me to continue doing my best work. Fortunately, there are a lot of good FAs, with whom I enjoy flying and I try to ignore the bad ones as much as possible.
This sounds heartfelt and sincere. The reality is that the cancer within FA’s has become so bad in the U.S. (it’s not just UA) that there is really little hope unless they tear down the entire system of hiring, training, and discipline. With that it will still take years to rid UA of the myriad of horrid people working there, especially senior FA’s on intl routes. The system is completely broken.
For passengers it has become miserable and y’all wonder why we book Intl carriers whenever it is possible.
I don’t buy that you do 200 flight hours per month. It is virtually impossible owing to FAA regulations and typical scheduling constraints.
I do mostly turns, some worth 11.5 hours, but most 8 to 10. I still have days off, and on occasion, a delay lets me have a paid day off, but overall EWR ops are much better and my flights operate on time. FAs have different rules than pilots.
I have never been served dessert on United following breakfast service in Polaris♀️
Always. But no ice cream any longer on the breakfast flights.
Everyone has a bad day. He may have been a last minute add to the crew. Finished closing the gap and then hit the FA sleep zone downstairs.
That United flight was terrible.
For those who mentioned Asian airlines, I saw on Instagram where an ex-EVA FA said that she was under a lot of pressure at work.
Is that a seatbelt in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
I’m sure the seniority-based bidding system used by all the large U.S. carriers isn’t going anywhere, but it often results in the worst service being provided on some of the longest and most revenue-producing flights.
Almost 40 years ago I remember writing a letter to AA (back then, a much better carrier than they are today) on this very topic. I flew frequently between HNL and SFO, and those flights were always manned by FAs in their 50s and 60s just hanging on for retirement. They’d provide the absolutely minimum service required and then disappear into the galley with curtains closed and chat amongst themselves until the next service. I suggested that AA find a way to mix up the roster a bit and interject some fresh blood onto those flights. To my surprise, I got a nice reply and they did seem to improve things for a few months after that. Eventually things went back to the way they’d been.
But I do think there is value in complaining about bad service. It gives the airline the opportunity to improve things, and once in a while they might actually do so.
As for brushing your crotch, that seems like click bait and there’s been too much of that on your site of late. I’m sure it was unintentional and he probably even brought you a drink after. Ha ha.
In my experience, ever since pre-ordering started, it is no longer “customary” for anyone to even discuss the menu with you. Maybe 25%of the time, someone will confirm.
BTW, after doing a morning flight once, I will never do another. Breakfast is UAs worst meal. So much worse than the usual crap.
I also find that when returning to the US, I get everything at once nearly everytime. The separate appetizer thing only seems to happen leaving the US. This is for TATL and TPAC.
I’m a UA 1k flier with almost 3 million miles on the carrier. So, I have a lot of experience with the slow erosion of standards there. Not long ago I would look forward to every flight. Food was never impressive, but adequate. FA’s were uniformly professional and attentive. Sadly, things have steadily deteriorated. Meals have become almost inedible, FA’s often disappear after a meal tray is summarily deposited and cabins are noticeably dirtier. Flights are delayed way too often. There are still dedicated Associates and good experiences, but they are becoming less common. I never thought that I would dread flying, but that day is fast approaching. Like other commentators, I’ve found Asian carriers to be far superior and direct my long haul flying to them whenever possible.
If the NMB isn’t going to let them strike even though they’ve voted to authorize it, and their company won’t come to the table and finalize the tentative agreement they’ve been dragging their feet on for three years, the only real method of retaliation is to make service unpleasant. If enough customers complain about it, maybe the company will stop acting in bad faith and finalize their contract already.
I know that at United the FAs estimate the length of the meal services on longhaul flights and then divide the time between in half to determine each half of the crew’s rest time. On my flights SYD-LAX the crew would be so fast in conducting the first meal service and I noticed how speedy it was vs. Qantas. Clearly the crew decided to be as quick as possible and probably took a solid 4 hours of rest each. Qantas crew never seem to be in a hurry to go on their break but on American or United, esp the senior crews are very often super ‘efficient’.
@JK … Bingo .
Here Here – level off – here’s your meal! UA FA’s mission statement, feed ‘em fast, put ‘em to sleep, then we can relax for the rest of the flight
@ M. Casey
Yup. And take that pudding to go!
What’s with the headline – “I had a grumpy FA” wouldn’t “grab” enuf readers?
This experience is standard for United. The surprise here is that you’ve had good experiences.
It may be, but cetianly has not been the case for me (going back many years).
What a “grumpy and unprofessional” article. The headline implies sexual assault.
The reality is simply a gruff flight attendant and an entitled passenger.
If you are to be part of the journalistic profession, you need to exercise discretion and responsibility.
Sorry, I won’t tolerate terrible flight attenndants like that and you are wrong to dismiss it as entitlement. And I made clear that I was not accusing him of seuxal assualt, because I do think intent matters.
When I get to fly in a premium seat on United long haul, I think of it as an experience. I may not be like a lot of the readers who fly premium class all the time so when I upgrade, I look at it like I am spending a lot of money/points for the seat but a big part of it is for service and the meal. I agree withe the review, it should be like going to a fancy restaurant (just like United wants you to think and feel by advertising it to be that) and when I got a terrible meal and service on a recent flight I would of written about it if I had the means. When you read a bad review on Yelp of a restaurant do you think that person is just entitled?
Sounds about like what I experienced on UA LAX-SYD (minus the crotch incident). I was really excited to fly Polaris, having saved up miles for a while. Sadly, the crew was grumpy, rude, downright unpleasant and of course, very “senior.”
Closing the blinds at 10am on a west-bound TATL sector? Nuh uh. Not doing it. If folks wanna sleep they can wear their eye mask.
“I won’t name this man publicly because that will not help him become a better flight attendant”: That’s the problem right there.
Are you sure you weren’t on AA?
Interesting way to describe yourself — happy “client.” I am also a 1K and consider myself either a passenger or customer. I’ve never thought of myself as a United “client.”
I just had a similar experience in Polaris Rome to EWR except there was no brushing my crotch. There was, however, an incident with the window shade in which I didn’t push it down all the way and the flight attendance rushed over with a wooden hanger. Without saying a thing, he leaned over me and slammed the shade down. I love United normally, but even other passengers said this guy wasn’t friendly. The description sounds like the same man. Could you email me his first name? I’ve been trying to decide whether to say all this on the United survey I was sent.